Is it normal to be overly jealous in a relationship?

59% Normal
5 Comments

I HAVE ISSUES.

Just preparing you for what I'll explain here in a few words. I think I have major insecurities that reflect onto my serious relationship negatively. In a "jealous" fashion. Is it normal to feel like it's Not Okay for your significant other to say "I love you" to his close female friends? I'm not okay with that. Love is special to me, and it should be used with family and your love. It made me very upset when I saw a text my bf sent to a girl I didn't know saying he loved her back. Found out she's his old best friends girlfriend, he committed suicide and they still keep in touch. Yup, I'm a dick right? But still, I felt betrayed.

I feel like my major issues with him talking to other females definitely bothers him. BUT I'm 19 and he's 25. So it's hard for me to trust other women and even try to be okay with him behaving like that. He has said he used to be jealous at my age too, but his ex gave him reasons to. And we have a great relationship, we're faithful, I'm just crazy.

Any advice? Any one else like me? I'm just tired of feeling like a screw up when we get into fights, but I can't stop how I feel or react to things...

Voting Results
59% Normal
Based on 39 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • FrizzyHaired
    7 years ago

    It's normal. Your just sensible.

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  • jesssallstr18
    11 years ago

    I'd be jealous too.

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  • debutaunter
    11 years ago

    The older you get, the more you realize that love transcends romantic relationships, and good friendships can exist between people of the opposite sex. As long as he never had any kind of romantic relationship with a girl of his past that he talks to, and if he had a bond somehow with some one before you two were even together ESPECIALLY, and it's not sketchy, just a dandy ol' friendship, then stop being a shithead, and give him all the love and trust you'd expect from him. If it bothers you that much though, and you feel like you're "taking shit" from him in one way or another, that shows no doubt that your relationship has room to grow. With each problem there are new levels of understanding to find. That's what makes growing together as a couple spectacular. Believe in you two. You're a team. Much love, from a fiancé in a serious relationship going on three years. The thoughts will linger and torture you until you've come to a point where you'll annoy yourself. You'll solve these problems eventually. The inner thoughts "haunt" until you investigate, but don't worry, it's all relatively (para)normal.

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    • Antir0b0t
      11 years ago

      This makes me hopeful, thank you. I appreciate the advice, it's helped broaden my perspective on the situation. I need to keep working at it, he's worth it. :)

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  • DarkSoul
    11 years ago

    Hello , in that case ofc u must be jealous , but in my opinion its not right that ur bf tells to a close female friend i love you when he is in a relationship well he could mean it as friends but still he can say it diff like "ILoveYou" is diff than " i love you " and " i love u " much diff , in my opinion why dont you talk to him and tell him that it really bothers? He might understand you and try not to say them usualy

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