Is it normal to be angry at your parents for having a disabled child?

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6 Comments

My little sister is disabled (Down syndrome). I feel so angry at my parents for giving birth to her, knowing the higher risks of having a disabled child (my mother was 40). Now, I find myself sacrificing my future because my parents are growing old and I'll have to take care of my sister when they are not able anymore. No one else can do it and I know I'll have to step in soon because my sister is not high-functionning like the DS people you see on propaganda videos. That means I will have to relocate to be closer to them (I moved to another country at 17, which was also a way to escape this situation). I feel so angry at my parents for imposing such a lifelong burden on me, why didn't they abort her? I love my sister but unfortunately, the burden will fall on my shoulders and it makes me feel extremely hopeless, even suicidal some days. I'm so anxious about the future and I can't help feeling extremey angry at my parents for making that choice without thinking about the impact it would have on their other child.

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 72 votes (36 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • yu-gi-ohChampion25
    8 years ago

    i see what your saying,but you sound so selfish with your wording. because of stress. they should set up buses every day and take the mental disabled to their own daycare center some day to fix this and give them a comfortable life. don't hate her because that easily could have been you born with down syndrome. just sayin.

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  • 53739
    8 years ago

    It's unfortunate and tragic but there are things in life that we just can't control. A lot of people don't get what they want, but they adapt and learn to make do the best of their situation. Sometimes there are things in life that change our perspective, for better or worse.

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  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    What do you mean when you say no-one else can care for your sister when your parents aren't around any longer? What country do you live in that has no care facilities for people with Down Syndrome?

    I hope for her sake that you don't end up caring for her because you're selfish and uncaring and she deserves better - she didn't ask to be born.

    You could at least talk to your parents and ask them if they've made any financial arrangements for her care after they're gone, but I'll bet if they have you'll then resent being cut out of some of your inheritance.

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  • lovelylady1516
    8 years ago

    i completely get it, totally normal. you didn't choose to have a DS sister, it just happened that way. and i can totally understand how that stresses you out. you should talk to them about your feelings.

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  • DADNSCAL
    8 years ago

    I can understand you being resentful, but very unfair of you to be angry. Have you tried talking it out with them? There has to be a solution other than you sacrificing your future.

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  • mysistersshadow
    8 years ago

    I can see why you don't want your life to change but its hard as someone that has family but they don't want to acknowledge they exist its very hurtful. Maybe you can be the person that abandons her to some kind of government assistance shes probly not even aware of you so you don't have to feel bad about it.

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