Is it normal to be a terrible conversationalist?

86% Normal
6 Comments

Simply put, I'm just boring as hell. I never have anything to talk about and conversations with me are usually punctuated with awkward silences. It's not really that I'm shy, I just literally can't think of anything to talk about. Whenever I'm in a group of people I feel jealous of the interesting topics people choose and all the witty jokes they can effortlessly make. I feel kinda like that here on is it normal too, my lack of conversation skills translates to the internet just as badly. I just feel like I can't do it, and yes, I do try to think of things to talk about, but it's to no avail. Is it normal?

Voting Results
86% Normal
Based on 44 votes (38 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • bigtoy
    11 years ago

    Read a book called "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie. It's old but it has some great tips for people who have this problem. One good one is to get the other person to talk about him or herself. People always love to talk about themselves and their lives, their experiences etc, so you just have to make questions that prompt them. Compare your parents, what your parents do, where you were brought up, what your school was like etc - things that the other person will have experience of too. Just don't make statements - make statements followed by questions that will get the person talking about him or herself, for example, I hated PE at school - what was the worst thing about school for you? Suddenly, you find it becomes easy to talk for hours. When you are alone try to think of questions that lead people to talk about themselves for when those awkward moments occur.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    yeah.. 0.0...yeah me also. ;)

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  • AnUneatenCarrot
    8 years ago

    Talking is a skill, and just as in anything else it requires practise. It also helps to know some techniques and strategies. Like for example have a list of subjects ready for when you encounter a new person. School/work, family, intrests, etc. Asking follow-up questions on answers also keeps a conversation alive. You are not alone in being bad at talking, but just keep practicing and you'll be fine! :)

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  • ifeel86
    11 years ago

    I was always exactly like that but I've gotten better. My guess is you dont really listen to others when they speak. You can't really hear what others are saying when your thinking about what to say while they're talking. To be a good conversationalist you need to work on really hearing what they're saying.
    Also understand that people love talking about themselves. If you ask questions about themselves and let them do all the talking they will think your a great conversionalist.

    People who love to talk love people like you.

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  • h8bangirl
    11 years ago

    Me too... and people around me just say "be more sociable", "why are you so quiet" but what am I supposed to talk about? I have no idea.

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  • anti-hero
    11 years ago

    God stop boring everyone :)

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