Is it normal to always like the person who least appreciates you?

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10 Comments

I don't do it on purpose but it always ends up like that. Sometimes i try to make myself like the guys that do appreciate me and show it. Right now i am seeing this guy who i adore and keep going back to, however, this is like the third time i am feeling like i need to speak up and itll be final. I don't plan on continuing how i am with him because he says he likes me but doesn't show it like other guys do. He told me a while ago that he liked me or else he wouldn't take me out to dinner, let me come over and chill, etc. But im like yes that makes sense but its the small things that count...like holding my hand, kissing me randomly, hitting me up just to chill, etc. Idc if you took me out...thanks but it doesn't mean anything when you take me out and you act casual during dinner or the day after. Hes admitted he has expressing issues even his ex gfs have told him he needs to put more effort no matter how much he likes them. Thats how im feeling now. I know were not officially together but him taking me out to dinner and places is leading me on. So as much as i like going out with him, i feel like i should tell him lets stop the whole going out thing as if we were together and just cool off since thats what we are right? and thats how he wants it too since the day after he takes me out he treats me like a friend. Ugh, hes your ideal guuy if giving mixed signals. On the other hand, my ex and this guy who likes me right now show me they appreciate me, tell me about my good qualities and it just sucks how the one i adore doesnt show it much. Who knows, he might appreciate me but doesn't show it...how can i tell if him taking me out is just cause he feels like he has to to make me happy? even though it doesn't.

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50% Normal
Based on 28 votes (14 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • Mister_Nobody
    10 years ago

    It's probably because your instincts tell you that the harder he is to get, the better he must be. This is very likely not the case, and I'd suggest that you give more attention to the guys who actually treat you nicely. They say love is blind though, and it isn't easy to 'make' yourself like someone just because they like you.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I did that with my ex and we broke up once then got back together then finally i said no i can't do this anymore. I didn't like him in the beginning then i saw how nice he treated me and thats why i gave it a chance. But the reason why it didn't work out was because simply of the fact that the person he is is not my type. Its really important to be into the other person and thats what was missing from our relationship. I didn't like him like i had a crush and passionate feelings for him. Thats how i feel about this guy...its just unfortunate that the only quality i dislike about him is how he lacks expressing himself. How will i ever know if he really likes me? What if i leave him and he doesn't have the balls to speak up and say how much he likes me? We could have an amazing relationship in the future if it wasnt for his lack of expression.
      Oh and if he is not expressing himself because he just doesn't like me to care, then he should just tell me. That will mean so much to me even if he tells me he doesn't like me. Lets stop wasting time here.

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      • Riddler
        10 years ago

        Maybe its because you see him as a challenge. Easy people are no fun to get. Its more fun when you have to work for it. So you found the least interested person in the room desirable.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          10 years ago

          Like I said below, when he shows me he wants me I love it. So its not like I go for the ones that want me the least. I genuinely like this guy from his personality to his style to his voice everything. Its not cause he shows the least interest. I love it when he shows me the simplest gestures like leans in and kisses me rather than me going to him. If only he did that more often. Don't get me wrong I like the challenge but for a certain amount of time. In the beginning was fine when i was hoping we'd end up talking and now we are, so for it to still be a challenge...it gets old.

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          • Riddler
            10 years ago

            Yes but if your the type of person that gets hit on a lot you might have more respect or desire to someone who is not waiting in line to give you a flower.

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            • Anonymous Post Author
              10 years ago

              I guess I wouldn't say I desire it but I guess I'm just not used to it especially after my last ex who still thinks of me as this super special person in his life. I sound like a brat lol but thats not how Im approaching this situation...its just I want the guy I really like to really like me too.

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  • AvrilLavigne
    10 years ago

    We too often love that ones who always ignore us, and ignore the ones who always love us.. Well, change.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      But I don't think people understand that its the person that counts too. Yeah they love us, but that doesn't mean we have to be with them. To me, its kind of cruel to love someone just cause they love you. You don't even like who they are, their style, their character, their look, etc. I would be devastated if someone tried to "love" me just cause I loved them and they don't even like me as a person.They're just there cause they feel like they have to. Its like "oh i should be with you cause no one else cares about me..." So people need to learn (and yes this is hard to do but...)to find someone they're actually into as a person and who loves them back. Itll be hard but its better than loving someone cause you feel like you should. So personally, I rather be with someone like this guy who I actually have feelings for and work for it and see if he likes me back as opposed to waste my time with someone I feel like I should be with.

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  • GreatArt
    10 years ago

    Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      But when he shows me he wants me, I love it. I wish it was like that all the time. So it can't be that...

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