Is it normal that sometimes i feel like i can't enjoy my relationship?

100% Normal
2 Comments

My boyfriend and I have a really great relationship - we've been friends for many years and best friends for two years. Of course its been rocky sometimes. We've fought a lot but we've gotten over our immaturity and repaired our friendship recently. Then we finally started dating anf it felt so natural. We never had a discussion like "hey we should start dating", it just happened and I never questioned it. I feel lucky that things are so easy. I love this guy and I know that this relationship is for the most part effortless. Now thta we're together I feel silly for not noticing how well we would have been together. (he wanted me for a while and I was in denial about wanting to be with him, I figured it was a phase because you will inevitably have feelings for a friend some time or another).

The problem here is that I'm afriad. This relationship matters more to me than any other one I've had. And I feel like its what I've always been waiting for. I'm afriad of it ending. I know that's normal, but sometimes I feel like this fear is creating an inability for me to enjoy him. I worry about every little thing, I freak out about potential fights we could have (but we havent fought in a long time), and I find myself talking to a guy thats interested in me and fantasizing about cheating eventhough I know I don't want to ruin this. And my worst fear is that I'm going away next year. I'll live about an hour away and he will be commuting to work almost every day. What if it doesn't work out?

Is it normal to be this afraid?

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100% Normal
Based on 20 votes
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Comments ( 2 )
  • jetstream13
    11 years ago

    of course it's normal! you're in love with him and he's really important to you. the important thing is to not give into your paranoia that the slightest mistake will screw your relationship up. taking things one day at a time, enjoying every moment you have together, and making sure to communicate with each other are great things to keep in mind. actually, communication is the most important thing for you guys, especially since you're going to be separated next year. tell him that you are scared, and explain why. if he loves you as much as you love him, he should be able to comfort you so that you guys can work through things and grow closer together. talking openly with each other about the future and your fears will help you feel better and be less scared :)

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      thanks :) I know youre right, paranoia can be powerful though.

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