Is it normal that my potential girlfriend has stubble on her chin?

72% Normal

So... this girl I really like has a little problem. She is actually blonde, so you cannot see it, but when kissing, it literally scratches my chin. She has a little bit of stubble hair on her chin and I told her about it. I know I hurt her feelings when mentioning it to her, and she indicated that she tried a bunch of things to get rid of it, but said she had only shaved it once a week. I know she'll probably try to shave it everyday now that I mentioned it, and I even considered ending the relationship because of it! It's just something I never experienced and didn't think I'd have to deal with.

She is a really nice girl and I believe it would be foolish to drop her in the cold for such a problem. However, what should I do? Even if she does shave it everyday, I'm sure their might be an occurrence or two where it might show up. Any of you guys have a similar situation?

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72% Normal

Based on 282 votes (202 yes)

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Comments ( 40 )

[Old Memory]

11 years ago | pl

And that's enough for you to want to dump her?

I'm sorry, but that sounds so unbelievably shallow.

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- Pandabear16
  
  11 years ago
  
  I agree, you really don't know what you have til it's gone.
  
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- PalestinianGuy
  
  11 years ago
  
  I don't think the op is shallow at all, girls are not supposed to grow beards.
  
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  - PumpkinKate
    
    11 years ago | pl
    
    Except for the part where women are still mammals...
    
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    - flutterhigh
      
      11 years ago
      
      I'm glad you're still here.
      
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      - PumpkinKate
        
        11 years ago
        
        Aww :) Thanks! I was just stuck on jury duty for a while there, so not much internet fun-times.
        
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Avant-Garde

11 years ago

You sound shallow. Some women are more hairier than others. She shouldn't HAVE to shave it off if she doesn't want to. If she does shave it off and it grows back, she could always shave it off again. I have slight mustache and it really isn't that noticeable. Blame it on hormones, but it happens. "End the relationship" over something as natural as this, that's incredibly silly. She doesn't deserve to be with someone as shallow as you!

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  Some of you guys are very mean about this. All I said was that it kind of scratched my chin when getting really close to her face (kissing). Come on, if you were a guy, and her chin scratched yours a little, what would you do? It actually hurts a little bit to be honest. I think many of you women are looking at this in black and white.
  
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  - PumpkinKate
    
    11 years ago
    
    It's not really being unfair of anyone, male or female, to be as "mean" as you say.
    
    It's not because "all you said" was about the hair scratching your chin. Or about it hurting. It's about you saying you would genuinely consider ending the relationship because of this one specific issue.
    
    They're upset because of your lack of commitment and willingness to throw away a wonderful woman due to a superficial issue. NOT because you dislike feeling a scratchy chin. Of course you dislike it. That's natural.
    
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  - Avant-Garde
    
    11 years ago
    
    Well, sorry about that. If was a man and with a woman with some stubble, I don't know what I would do about it. It probably wouldn't really bother me and if it hurt then I'd probably try to deal with it. I would hate to hurt her feelings and give her a complex about it.
    
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  - disthing
    
    11 years ago
    
    "and I even considered ending the relationship because of it!"
    
    I think that's the bit most of these women have a problem with; and fair enough, it does make you seem shallow.
    
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  - cookiesaregreat
    
    11 years ago
    
    Are you serious? This sounds a little trollish to me to be honest. And it hurt your cheek too? heh.
    I mean, if you really mean this.. damn, just damn.
    
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tori

11 years ago

Just wait till you get older. The hair in your ears will look like spiders.
If that's all you see in her, leave now.

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Jane2me

11 years ago

She could have a disease, a problem with the balance of her hormones. She should see her doctor abouts getting a simple test. Medication could easily fix the problem so it is nothing to cringe about and could have a easy remedy. It is a symptom and should be checked out.

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ccjigsaw

11 years ago

I dunno, it seems more shallow because of this= "I really like her." "I'm considering dumping her because of facial hair." If you 'really' like her then it doesn't matter much cause she's making an effort to shave it off, and it's not like she's growing it just to piss you off. She can't help it, and it's not in her control, I'd have a little sympathy. I'm not a guy though, but I don't think anyone likes to be judged like that. I'm sure if she knew it bothered you so much you've considered ending it, she wouldn't give the time of day.

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Nikkito

11 years ago

She probably has a condition. It's best, if you really like her, to stay with her despite it. She's probably already really insecure about it.

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Ouroboros

8 years ago

2 years in, I to have questioned myself over quite similar certcumstances for considering leaving my partner, (although our issues are more dynamic than just this subject).
My GF hid it for 4 months very well until she decided to tell me. I had already fallen for her so shrugged it off. I do not like the feel of stubble during intimacy but i love her so i deal with it.
After a conversation about the hersutism she revealed she had tried everything at great cost to her credit card, and her mothers in the past; NHS only revealed slightly higher testoterone levels but no other underlying problems. This is just natural for her.
So, yes i would like her to be able to erradicate this hersute issue. But no, I don't not want her to change for me. I will never ask of her do that.

Each to there own. Do what feels right buddy.

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Zippy

11 years ago

It sounds to me like her stubble isn't the main issue. I think that if you would consider dropping her over something like that, then you probably just didn't like her too much to begin with. Now, if she was totally your type and you were really into her, and all that went away when you noticed that stubble, I would say you were being exceptionally shallow. It's normal for something like that to be a turn off, but it shouldn't be a relationship killer. Especially since it's a manageable problem.

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  So, until you've experienced this situation your "shallow" comment has no strength whatsoever.
  
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  - Zippy
    
    11 years ago
    
    I havn't experienced your exact situation, but I have been in a relationship where I had to deal with some things that just weren't perfect for me. You know what I did? I communicated with him, told him what bugged me, and dealt with the little things that couldn't be changed all the way. I was able to do this because I knew I had(and still have) a great person overall.
    Plus, there's the attraction factor too. I didn't just KNOW I had a good person, I felt it. I was into him, still am, and that's why I said stubble probably wasn't the main problem for you. I still think that it would be odd for you to dump someone you thought was fantastic until you felt that scratch. A person you're really into doesn't just go down the drain because you felt a scratch. I think if that was the case, then you have your standards of femininity set too high for you to focus on the person for who she is. I'm not saying you go date a woman with a full on beard, I get that there's a limit, but I can't imagine why a little stratch would be so jarring to toss a person you're really into away. A person you're not so into, I can understand, I will definitely concede that.
    Lastly, I wasn't deliberately trying to offend you. Only stating my honest opinion.
    
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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  When you're in the middle of a deep kissing session and the stubble keeps poking you, I'm willing to bet you'd have a different outlook on the situation. As manageable as you might think it is, it's just the opposite actually. No matter how much she thought she was able to manage it, it grew back so fast that there was no point. And sometimes, being a woman, you'd naturally forget to take care of those things once and a while. You're correct, the stubble wasn't the main issue; however, it was a huge one nonetheless. When one is looking for a significant other they are looking for a package deal. If something in that package doesn't feel right then why would one waste their time? Personally, I don't care how beautiful a girl is, if she has stubble, I wouldn't go any further with her in a relationship. Period. It feels to unnatural for me to have to deal with hair on her face rubbing on mine. Complete turn off. I'm glad I experienced this, though. It helped me be a little more observant early on when choosing a significant other.
  
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aurora73

11 years ago

If you can have an open dialogue about it, tell her it scratches your chin a bit but be nice make a liile joke out of it! Call it her 'scratch-patch' or something cutesy like that! She'll start shaving it before she sees you! Then never ever ever ever mention it again!!! Hopefull if you like her enough you'll get over it! If you don't like her enough to overlook something so superficial then stop sleeping with her!!!

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Sog

11 years ago

You're asking too much if you expect her to just solve her hair problem completely. It's not going to go away, and you shouldn't have to make her hide it.

No one is perfect. You just have to learn to accept and even appreciate the flaws in people. If you dump this one, then what? Maybe the next girl will have an unsightly mole on her neck, or uncontrollable body odor when you make out.

But if this is so absolutely repulsive to you that you can't even be intimate with her, then yes it could be a dealbreaker. Does that make you a little shallow? Sure. But that's life.

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Marisol

11 years ago

This is a tough question. It is really up to you. Just know that she cannot control hair growth on her chin and that it effects her a lot; especially now that you told her about the little issue. Talk to her about it. But, before you do, think about everything. Ask yourself why you are going out with this girl, what you like about her. And then, weigh all those things against her having a stubble on her chin.

If you drop her you will hurt her feelings, but even if you do, she is already hurt now that you mentioned it to her. Then again she might be stronger than that. It isn't her fault that she has a stubble on her chin, and I am sure that she would be more than happy not to have it.

If you decide not to drop her, help her. Maybe there is a way by which she can get rid of it which won't affect her in any bad way. See how it goes, maybe you get used to it or stop noticing it. Who knows? You found a nice girl, having her around sounds good to me.

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Darkoil

11 years ago

I don't think your being shallow, most of the people commenting have never had a relationship so I wouldn't bother listening to them. Although I have never been in this exact situation there is always some little thing I don't like about the girl I'm dating, it's better to bring it out into the open, if there was something about yourself she didn't like I'm sure you would want to know. At the minute the girl I'm with is a real stunner but she puts too much makeup on, I said babes you do know you look better without so much make-up but she said she likes it, that leaves me up shits creak cos if she likes it then I have to find a way to deal with it.

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sp123

11 years ago

She might have a testosterone imbalance of some sort something to do with hormones at least. If shes nice and you like her enough to see past the facial hair then stay with her if not and you think its a problem then leave her. I can honestly say that I dont think your shallow for this, if i were in your situation i would have the same reaction. Shallow guys wouldve already dumped her so dont worry about it.

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singlecent

11 years ago

I think you did good thing by telling her, but now give her some time to figure out how to mantain a smooth complexion . I don't think shaving is the best answer she should try waxing or threading . I hope it all works out for you .

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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

Laser hair removal

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  It can't be lasered. She is blonde.
  
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  - kittenmitten
    
    11 years ago
    
    That is an hilariously stupid response.
    
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    - Anesthesiologist
      
      11 years ago
      
      Yea. Okay. Blonde hair can't be lasered, imbecile.
      
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  - joybird
    
    11 years ago
    
    If it's as thick and sharp as you say then it won't be too blonde to be lasered, it's probably noticeable which is why she shaves it. The laser treatment is great for those under 40 yo. God help you when you date those over 40 or you're married to one!
    
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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You guys could make a fortune at a carnival freek show. Have her start shaving regularly. And secretly slip synthetic testosterone in her food.

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  lmao
  
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chewy

11 years ago

Give him a break guys there is a difference between been shallow and having no standards.

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  is this an insult?
  
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  - chewy
    
    11 years ago
    
    Absolutely not.
    
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    - Anesthesiologist
      
      11 years ago
      
      Okay.
      
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Andrew256

11 years ago

That's fucked up. Dump the broad.

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- Anesthesiologist
  
  11 years ago
  
  It's already done.
  
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal that my potential girlfriend has stubble on her chin?