Is it normal that my mother treats me this way?
My mother seems to hate me. She throws away my things without asking; she even threw away an art project that I was working on because she didnt think it was very good. She never wants to spend time with me. Just yesterday she said she was bored, so I asked "Why dont we go for a drive and look at the new horse riding centre?". She just replied "no". But an hour or so later my brother walks in and she says "___, let me know if you want to go out, I'll take you anywhere you want".
My brother is 21 and fully capable of taking care of himself, but my mother buys him 10 box meals per week and says I'm not allowed to eat them because I can cook for myself. But as soon as my mom leaves the house, my brother will make himself burgers and egg/bacon sandwiches.
My mother literally, no exaggeration here, places the dogs higher on the priority list than she does me. She spends abour 20 minutes cooking them fresh dinner every night but wont even spend 60 seconds listening to my goals for the future.
I tried to show her a word document I put together which maps out my college finances and application stuff in detail. At first she just started walking away, but then my dad said "give 2 minutes to your daughter" so she sat down. But all she did was slouch and look around and say "mmhmm" a few times before walking away as if she had been freed from torture.
I feel so insignificant and as if I have to constantly fight to be seen as an important part of the family. I have no idea what to do.
My father picks up on the tension...my mother treats him this way too (on a less severe level) but he is so non-confrontational that he wont say anything. My mother knows how to get her way by throwing a tantrum when people try to talk to her. The other day I said "You make me feel so small and unwanted" And she replied "Oh shut up and go away". She shuts me down before I can even express my feelings.