Is it normal that my mom and i already planned for her death?

When I was 18, my Mom told me that she listed me in her will as the executor of her estate.

She told me about the life insurance, how much was divided between all three of us (I got the most, my sister got slightly less and the least to my younger brother), and then told me that she wanted to be cremated and thrown into the ocean from Hawaii and the funeral is my choice.

She told me to do whatever I want with the rest of the insurance and to cut costs wherever so I can have as much left for myself as I want. She then told me that what is to be done with her property (as far as distribution to my siblings etc) is my discretion and what is to be done with the life insurance until my brother is 18 (if she dies before then) is my discretion.

She even had me agree to pull the plug if she ever goes into a coma and becomes a vegetable. She told me to pull it myself if need be. I also have power of attorney.

Personally, I plan on doing what is best with her property and distributing it to whomever I feel can make the best use out of it, but I wonder if it is normal for a healthy, middle aged parent to have this conversation with their 18 year old daughter. We've had it several times before but not this in depth until I was 18, and even now she mentions it. Is this normal?

Voting Results
72% Normal
Based on 50 votes (36 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Absolutely, yes!

    It is a very important conversation that all parents should have with their grown up children.

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  • 1000yrVampireKing

    I am already making a will. I have very little worth value so it is kind of hard though.

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  • Mando

    She obviously respects and trusts you.

    Now call her and say "I'm coming over to pull the plug."

    :) Just kidding.

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  • Someone2

    Me and my mum actually giggle about it at times, how my mum would get angry I I got her lilies at her funeral because she's allergic. She talks about the flowers and wills, and everything. The children need to know, so sadly when It does happen there is no worry. Me and my mum are weird giggling about funny jokes we could on the grave and what music to have :)

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  • ForMyPeaceOfMind

    Well, the fact is...life and death are a part of life! It sounds like your mom just wants to make sure all her ducks are in a row before her untimely demise. I know that kind of talk can be unpleasant, but it's necessary!

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  • Unimportant

    Sounds like a healthy attitude.

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  • malkiot

    It's perfectly normal. Most (mature) people are aware that they may end up in accident or may be incapacitated otherwise.

    Especially when they have young children, they will either make sure that their potential guardians know about everything (or leave detailed documentation) or if one or more children are of age, discuss everything with them.

    They just don't want you to be caught unawares in an eventuality and lose everything else on top of themselves.

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