Is it normal that my girlfriend kissed her guyfriend

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year. Guys would ask her out, but she would tell them she had a boyfriend already. So instead they would try to be friends with her, and she would aspect and tell me about them.

At one point we had a hard spat, and at the same time one guy who had asked her out, got her number and would take her out a few times as a friend, But he would hint at liking her. She would tell me about him, and how cool she thought he was. And she would also tell me how she didn't like him as anything more then friend. This goes on for a few weeks less then a month.

One night when things between us started to get better, the guy took her out all night and over to some look out. After a small drink she in the car they where in, she tells him everything that's been happening between us and cry's. they walk around a bit and he hugs her, then kisses but she doesn't really kiss back. After about two more attempts he stops and tells her that he can tell she doesn't really want this and said he wont try again.

That same night we talk and admits to me that she was out with him, but doesn't tell me about the kiss. Feeling awful about her meeting him I run all night from my house to hers, 12 miles in the rain for 5 hours till sunrise. once at her house she tells me she wants to be with me, and confesses about the kiss. but later that night she talks to the guy and cry's for him because he seems to be awkward talking to her as he doesn't know what to do anymore.

The decided not to talk for a bit, wait for things to cool down to start as friends again. But it seems like he still likes her, and she still wants to be friends with him.

I know that at some point she thought of him as a possible rebound guy, so the fact that he'll still be around makes me worry. As of now things are ok between us, she has feelings for me, but I know she has doubts about us and the guy. She asked me what to do about him, if they should continue talking or just stop all together. I've voiced my feelings about it, but I've told her that I can't make a decision like that for her. I could try to be ok with it, but I've lost my trust in the both of them together and nothing happening. She's told me that no one makes her feel the way I feel when I kiss her, and that she wont let anyone kiss her for sure now.

To be honest I don't know if I mane the right decision about this. I really love her, the deep unforgettable kind. The kind I'm sure now that she used to have for me, but after this I can't be sure anymore. What should I do about us, and this guy?

Voting Results
16% Normal
Based on 106 votes (17 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • Joyless

    Simple!

    Step by step.
    1. Love her? Forgive her.

    2. Don't forbid HER from seeing HIM.

    3. Speak to HIM, away from HER. Tell HIM that you don't want HIM around anymore! Also be sure he understands this is not a suggestion, this is not a simple statement of fact. Forbid HIM from seeing HER. Be assertive even threatening but DO NOT GET VIOLENT this will hurt you in the long run.

    4. The next step goes by his reaction
    a) if he gets violent then you must also.
    b) if stays away you leave him well alone.
    c) if he tells her what you said deny it and make sure it looks like a desperate move to split you up on his part.
    d) if he continues to see her and says nothing you must reassert your position and keep pushing till he keeps away or gets violent.

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  • DiscoDuck

    Have no doubt....she does not love you like you love her.

    Have no doubt....she has feelings for this other person [intimate feelings]

    Have no doubt....she if not the faithful type of person

    Make your decision and live with it, if you stay don't complain and whine when you find out she is sleeping around.

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  • A lot of women have to deal with guy "friends" who are also, or even exclusively, interested in romance. I think it is reasonable for you to talk to her about this, and to ask her about this to get an idea of her judgement. You could then talk to her about her feelings and intentions on this other guy. If you are satisfied about her judgement & the clarity of her feelings & intentions, forgive her. If not, really consider moving on because you are can't be expected to trust her and be burned again.

    You could also talk to the guy. But she is the one who needs to have better judgement and clear intentions around other guys.

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  • Sorry to say but whether she kissed back or not, she let it happen and then didn't tell you about it. That's still cheating. This is why when people are in relationships they shouldn't be allowed to hang out by themselves with someone of the opposite sex. There is no need to even put yourself in that position.

    I myself believe if you are in a relationship that you shouldn't have close friends you hang out with of the opposite sex unless they hang out with you AND your spouce. Because getting close with someone else is emotionally cheating and it's not fair to the person you are dating.

    If I were you I would move on. If she can't decide between you two then she doesn't love you. But if you really want to give it a try with her then she needs to stop all contact with that guy.

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  • Comm0nSense

    go ahead get a .45
    cal and have a nice talk with him

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  • jessicia16

    I will have to say with certinty that she does not love you as you love her ... she's like many girls that cry and play several guys at once ... i wont call her a slut , but you get the point .... ANY guy who comes along with more money , power or charm will win her lust and you'll end up feeling it in spades ... no normal girl hangs out with male friends while in a relationship and to end up kissing her friend? wow thats deeply scummy,... its just a huge pile of BS! on her part ... dont make the same mistake again, give her up and in a year you will be so thankful... otherwise anyone with sence can guarantee you it will end way worse.... and you will forever be a much smaller man for it , and she wont even want you.

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  • GJP

    Run away as fast as you can... This is only the beginning of life filled with uneasiness, distrust and heartache! Run and don't look back!

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  • Mando

    Do you think she's setting him up as a new prospect?

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  • Brad07305

    You'll stay with her until she finally leaves you for another guy. You're just that kind of guy.

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  • depends on how close they are...

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  • kingofthedust

    That's fucked up, man, but these people are right. She is very emotionally attached to that guy, I can guarantee you of this. Cut the little man short, but don't take it out on her. Buck up and tell this guy to back off. Love is property.

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