Is it normal that my dad used to wait till everyone was asleep?

25% Normal
8 Comments

I have been dealing with this for years now. I can't talk to anyone in my family because if it isn't normal, I don't want to make a big deal out of it. I am almost 21 years old now but when I was 10-12ish, my dad used to wait until everyone was asleep in the house (my mom, all 5 of my sisters) and come into my room and give me a back massage. He never touched me inappropriately or anything like that I just also thought it was strange that it always seemed like a secret. It started off when I twisted my shoulder weird and when I asked, he would rub my shoulders but then it progressed to him asking me to stay up until he could come into my room and into my bed after my mom and sisters were asleep. Then after some time of him rubbing my back and shoulders, he would ask me to rub his back. Sometimes we would fall asleep but he would always leave before anyone else ever woke up. Was that normal??? We would always have really long hugs too and I always thought we were just having a moment but I noticed as I got older, no one else does that. I am worried that it wasn't normal and that maybe it wasn't right at all. What are your thoughts??

Voting Results
25% Normal
Based on 51 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • ArayaLioness
    9 years ago

    I have no clue. But it's weird that he waits until everyone's asleep.

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  • GiveMeAFuckingNameAlready!
    9 years ago

    Is he affectionate with your mother at all?. If they have a rocky marriage his actions could be trying to fill a void left unfulfilled. Are you sisters indifferent toward him?. You could be the favorite and he's just babying you. You stated nothing inappropriate happened. Sounds like a lonely man starving for affection to me.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Creepy.

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  • gloryholeflasher
    8 years ago

    Nobody can know without asking your Dad, what was on his mind. In your Dad's defense I would like to say that anybody can be tempted to do something we shouldn't, and we all have different weaknesses, yet regardless of whatever was going on in his mind he did stop himself from crossing the line into forbidden territory. It appears to me that your Dad loved you and you should be comforted by knowing that!

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    No. It reminds me of my grandmother's behaviour long after she stopped abusing sexually. She would give me this weird back caress. It would start from my head and end at part of my bottom. Usually, she did this when we were alone, but once she did it at a public parking lot. It was during that occurrence that I told her to stopped and she got mad at me.

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  • pixie44
    9 years ago

    My mom used to rub my back to get me to fall asleep. I had constant night terrors and would never want to sleep though. So this is how she relaxed me and I would usually fall asleep while she was rubbing my back. So her method worked. lol Idk if that's what your dad was doing though.. :/

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  • regisphilbin
    9 years ago

    your father sounds like a very loving and caring and supportive man, shame on you for having the audacity to paint him in a perverted light.

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    • xxbebopedxx
      9 years ago

      I don't think you should be shaming her for being curious. If this happened to me, I'd probably be having the same thoughts

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