Is it normal that my dad is gay?

46% Normal
20 Comments

My mom and dad have been married for 20 plus years,but a few days ago I find out my dad may be gay or bisexual..I found out from a friend of a friend that he is a regular at a gay club.I found it so hard to believe until I pretended like I wanted to do him a favor and wash his car to see if their was any evidence of the truth.Now I wish I never would have done that because I seen more than my eyes can bare.It was pictures underneath his seat with him and another man in crazy positions and I know their is no denying that he is gay.What should I do? my mom is going to be so heartbroken.I haven't spoke to my dad in 5 days and he pretty much dont know that I know,he just thinks I'm going through my teenage moods.

Voting Results
46% Normal
Based on 116 votes (53 yes)
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Comments ( 20 )
  • psm45
    12 years ago | pl

    Everyone knows IT'S BUTTERS!

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  • Nikki:)
    12 years ago

    ^^ I agree. Your mom probably knows and is cool with it. You're a teenager, do you probably won't understand at all (along with most adults) but sometimes people make things work in unconventional ways

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  • bryson_willis
    12 years ago

    I can't imagine what this even feels like...

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  • beearch
    12 years ago

    Just ask your mum if she thinks your dad is gay, you will probably find she already knows. He hangs at fag clubs and leaves photos lying around so isn't trying too hard to hide the fact he is gay.

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  • Hmmaybe
    12 years ago

    Well he must be bi not gay because he must have had sex with your mom. Otherwise you wouldn't exist :P.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    It may be hard for you but as a mom married for over 20 years I would want to know - purely for selfish reasons, like my own health!

    If it was my son I'd expect him to bring me the photos, then walk away to let me deal with it in my own way. If your mom knows, there won't be any upset but if she doesn't she will thank you in the end. You never know, she may be going through hell with suspicions and be glad to get rid of him ;o)

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    I think you should talk to him about it and then tell your mom. She deserves to know the truth.

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  • Inspector019
    12 years ago

    ^^I doubt the problem is the gay part.... It's probably more the whole married and living a lie part...

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  • TyLee
    12 years ago

    You really need to talk to your mom about this. She gave birth to you. She deserves to know for sure and she deserves to have the ability to be free of a cheating husband. You need to show her the pictures because she will want to deny that it is true. The truth really can set one free even though it will be hard to take in. I'm sure she probably suspects something but is waiting for real proof before she will take action. You can save her! Tell her!

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  • Inspector019
    12 years ago

    Tell your dad the jig is up... Give him the option of being the one to fess up.

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  • Thatguy777
    12 years ago

    Either talk to your dad about it or ignore it. If you tell your mom, she'll either know, and be ok with it, or she'll freak out and divorce him. Hopefully she knows about this, and let's him do this. It's not like he's dating anyone else..

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  • justinetld
    12 years ago

    Keep in mind it's probably just as difficult for him. It's a pretty big secret.

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  • justinetld
    12 years ago

    It's totally normal, although it may cause issues with family.

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  • pheonixx
    12 years ago

    Oh my that must really suck. Im sorry that you had to find out that... I don't know what to say, but usually when I go through problems, I just think, I can't be the only one in the world going through this, there is probably more than 1 person in the world going through the same problem, if that makes sense... I don't know, it works sometimes on me.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    I think this is fake, who leave pictures underneath a car seat?

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Oh my god I can imagine that feeling... The heavy sinking of your heart... Wow, I don't want to suggest anything because this situation could tear your family apart. It's like a catch 22... All I can say is, people do get what they deserve. We are not God, mother nature, karma, or whatever you believe in, so it's best to let them do the work. Whatever's suppose to happen will happen; just follow your heart.

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  • noginockr
    12 years ago

    I am so sorry you have to deal with this. Truly a sad situation. Your mom probably knows or suspects. I would confront him first, and depending on his response, I would definitely tell her. Not many women would put up with this behavior. If she doesn't already know, she WILL be devastated.

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  • basedgod
    12 years ago

    I think you should talk to him about it before you tell your mom because it might break te marriage and maybe it will affect on you...so be careful with your choices and good luck :)

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  • DcMithra
    12 years ago

    theres nothing wrong with being gay, leave him alone! YOUR A DICK HEAD

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    • Cucumber
      12 years ago

      You're*

      Wow, really? Did you only read the title, you lazy ass? The whole point is that he has a wife of 20+ years who may or may not know which would be considered cheating, dishonest, etc. Learn to read.

      Anyways, let's be real here. If you do decide to tell your mom, please prepare yourself before you tell her. I am saying this because although everyone will want you to go on and tell your mom... Also realize what will happen next and prepare yourself/feelings. Be aware that it may/may not break your family. I mention this because I think it's better to expect the worse so the outcome won't be so unexpected (which could feel twice as worse). It is definitely a lot of pressure (I had a very close best friend/considered sister, whose dad cheated on the mom with another woman), but sometimes it might be O.K. Who knows? What if she's been suspecting it awhile back and you telling her confirms it (sometimes it's hard to conceal your other "identity" to your spouses). Maybe she might take it O.K., maybe not. Good luck with whatever choice you decide to make!

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