Is it normal that my boyfriend rejects me sexually

My boyfriend is a christian, we've been dating for almost a year and we want to get married once im 19,(were both 18) I know its young but we REALLY love eachother and we want to stay together for the rest of our lives and our parents are ok with it. He wants to wait until marriage to have sex with me.He is a virgin but Im not.He thinks Im a virgin..

When he first told me he wants to wait until were married to have sex i didnt know he was that serious.. Every time were kissing and touching on a bed he gets an erection, Sometimes he lets me give him a hand job while were kissing but nothing more than that,he always gets mad after and says'' we arent supposed to do more than kissing''(where is it written in the bible??) and then he get mad, he always pushes me away Even when he touches me he gets mad at me like i was controlling his hands and he says ''why did you let me touch you? youre supposed to tell me to back off'' he gets mad at me for his own actions .. i think its ridiculous... He acts like someone is watching us or like I have a std or something. 90% of christians arent virgin so i dont know whats wrong with him. I dont want to wait another year before having sex with him.
He already let me give him a hand job after 11 months so why wont he have sex with me ? Im a christian too, and i respect his choice but its just stupid. When he's hard, he always blaim me and I know he likes it when I seduce him but he still gets mad at me. A normal guy, christian or not would not act like that

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34% Normal
Based on 173 votes (59 yes)
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Comments ( 21 )
  • dom180

    He's probably frustrated because what his body is telling him goes against his beliefs, and he gets even more frustrated when he fails to maintain self-control. His body is telling him that he wants sex (because he gets an erection, it feels good to him when you touch him), but his conscious mind is trying to convince him that he doesn't (because it goes against his religious beliefs).

    He takes his frustration out on you by getting angry, which is wrong of him. Part of him likes being seduced by you - who doesn't like sexual attention from their partner? - but part of him wishes you wouldn't tempt him because he also wants to wait. Perhaps he feels disgusted that he can't control himself completely when you do tempt him, and he takes that out on you even more.

    You, on the other hand, are confused by the mixed signals from him. Half the time he loves the sexual attention he gets from you, and half the time he gets angry with you for being sexual. There's nothing wrong with giving sexual attention to someone you love. It's natural and healthy to desire that dimension to your relationship.

    What he wants deep down is for you not to tempt him so much. Of course, that is understandably very difficult for you because holding back from your partner never really feels natural. It's difficult for him as well, because what he wants doesn't make sense to his body.

    I think his behaviour is normal for someone in his position, but I see why it's difficult to understand. Try to be as understanding as you can, and hopefully he'll respond by understanding how difficult it is for you.

    I think it's great that you feel you're ready to get married. I'm the same age as you and I think it would be great I had someone like that. Make sure you don't rush into it just so you can start having sex, though.

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    • Anime7

      Listen to this guy OP, what he said is good advise.

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    • DangerousPotatoGuy

      well said

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  • CozmoWank

    Your boyfriend has issues and shouldn't be blaming you for them. Have an open, frank discussion with him or find a Christian guy with less emotional baggage who appreciates your attention.

    He lets you jerk him off but you failed to mention if he returns the favor. Does he just leave you sexually frustrated? Kind of selfish and fucked up. What kind of asshole lets his girlfriend give him a handjob then bitches about it later? He needs to grow up.

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    • CozmoWank

      Given more thought to this...

      ...midway thru the next handjob when he's close to the brink, stop and tell him "this is wrong" and start zipping his pants back up. See what his reaction is.

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  • kelili

    If you really love him, please respect his believes.

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  • Tommythecat.

    "i respect his choice but its just stupid"

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    • Karmasbitch

      Haha glad I'm not the only one noticing that.

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  • Anime7

    I think it is sort of messed up that he gets angry at you after every sexual thing you do that he willingly participates in. Honestly I mean it's not like you're controlling him, I think you guys should probably talk about that. Cause I get the feeling that he's always going to be angry at you after you guys go beyond kissing.

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  • ThisIsImpossible

    I dont get how you fail to see how a false religion is negatively affecting your lives. Dump jesus and go have sex with somebody while you're still young. Jeez.

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  • RoseIsabella

    The way I see it you have two choices. One, you can respect his wishes and wait until you're married for sex. Or two, you can leave your boyfriend and find someone else who won't make you wait.

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  • sega31098

    Sorry, but according to Christian standards the handjob was already a breach of the rules.

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    • Idktbh

      I didn't handjob was a sin

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  • Karmasbitch

    Angry masturbation has gotta be better than sad masturbation. As he gets mad just keep jerking him off until he can't contain his load. Then let his volcano erupt all over your face and then ask him if he still wants to wait.

    .. Just sayin'

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  • handsignals

    Your 18 years old go out and party and get laid.

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  • Mazlow

    You gotta be a little more subtle about it...

    If you really want him to do what you want, tease him to the point he can't think straight anymore. You don't really need to touch his salami to do it. There are other very sensitive spots you can toy with.

    Guys have a stage where they cease to reason. The line's very blurred. At that point, he'd rob a bank if you asked him to... let alone, having sex with you on his own whims.

    When you're done, all you'll need to do is sit back and enjoy the fireworks.

    Once knows how good the cookie is, not even an angel will keep him away... Which might be a problem soon enough too...

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  • CDmale4fem

    I think he should go take a shower and jack it. (I know, this post is 3 yrs old.

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  • robbieforgotpw

    I powersharted

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  • Unimportant

    And once again it is religion, that stands in the way of happiness.

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  • Rape him

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    • dom180

      Hmm.

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