Is it normal that my boyfriend is completely messed up?

26% Normal
11 Comments

Okay, so my boyfriend and I have been together for a couple of years on and off and I was massively in love with him. We argued a lot and so it never lasted. We're back together now and everything seemed fine, however whilst on holiday, I've recently found out he is hugely messed up. He replies to dating adds asking for fun, gets wasted and takes drugs on his own, doesn't talk to me and I'm pretty sure he's cheated numerous times, or at least has suggested he wants to.

The thought of him makes me physically sick at the moment, but is it normal to still want to be with him? When we're together everything is amazing and I do care so much about him that I'm worried I've done something wrong to turn him into this!

Voting Results
26% Normal
Based on 57 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • Dad
    11 years ago

    But you're in love with him?
    This is one of those situations where the worst guy ever has the best girl isn't it? All he needs to do now is hit you a bit then you'll be perfect together in your trailer home.
    Actually maybe get out and have a better life. There's a thought.

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    • BluntsRolled
      11 years ago

      This^

      All I read was, My BF sucks, should I stay with him?

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    • ccjigsaw
      11 years ago

      I can't help but love some of you're comments :D :D A thumbs up just wasn't enough for this.

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  • dom180
    11 years ago

    I'm sure you've not done anything wrong to make him how he is. People change over time, and he's changed into someone who is bad for you. If you were arguing from the start it sounds like you were never going to work.

    I don't think you're in love with him. I think you're in love with the idea of being with him and the memories of what it was like when everything was okay. He doesn't love you back though, or he wouldn't be doing this to you. He is NOT the victim, you are. He's just using you and he's not good for you. It will be difficult at first, but you've got to leave him.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Why? Honestly, if you know he has most likely done these things and choose to be with such a person, then you can't blame anyone else.
    Have some self respect, leave him and find someone else.

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  • Lynxikat
    11 years ago

    Come ON, have a LITTLE self-respect for yourself and stop dating this prick.

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  • alv1592
    11 years ago

    I agree with everyone else. Leave him, you can do better.

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  • FocoUS
    11 years ago

    Love doesn't die in a day so it's normal to be attached. But think with your head, hearts don't think. You KNOW he's bad for you and you know you should leave him even if you don't want to.

    So leave him.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    He does sound "messed up" and quite self-destructive too.
    I think you are normal for continuing to love him despite he negative behavior. It probably has nothing to do with you too. It doesn't sound like you've talked to him yet about this, I think you should. Tell him how much you love him and are concerned about him, but don't allow him to pull the wool over your eyes and say whatever it is you want to hear from him. If he is unrepentant for deceiving you, then find a new boyfriend. Discuss ways that you can improve and strengthen your relationship instead of focusing entirely on everything that has gone wrong.

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  • MarkGibbons
    11 years ago

    Yes, It's normal. It's actually the scenario with my ex now. However, I'm happiest when shes out of my life. I do miss her, but slowly, things are getting better. Wish us both luck!

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    • bigtoy
      11 years ago

      I can relate to that. Funny how we miss people who really aren't good for us.

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