Is it normal that my boyfriend doesn't want to go to college with me?

72% Normal
7 Comments

My boyfriend of 2 and a half years told me that he was thinking of going to a different college than me. He didn't give me a reason why he wanted to go but I know his friend is going there. I think he is just going because his friend is and I know that the 2 of them together might cause problems between us. (plus they like clubs so that might mean the end of the relationship, but I love him and want him with me). Is it normal and how should i approach this?

Voting Results
72% Normal
Based on 94 votes (68 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • YBNormal
    13 years ago

    To answer your asked question, yes it's normal. To answer your unasked question, it's probably bad news. There's no reason to repeat what everyone else above has said, but I feel that most replies are spot-on. Odds are good he's ready to explore the world, and this is his way of gently letting you go (or worse, keeping you off to one side while he explores, just in case he needs you later).

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  • Cybil
    14 years ago

    He could possibly have a different career choice than you. Anyway it's his decision. I think your being a bit too possessive.

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  • KingTermite
    8 years ago

    He's already not faithful to you, take him going elsewhere as a blessing.

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  • HurrrDurrr
    13 years ago

    95% chance he's going to break up with you, or worse cheat on you. Not going to sugar coat it, unless you're both going to top-tier colleges for a very specific field he has no reason not to be with you. If he was really in love with you he'd want to be with you (geographically).

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  • sierrahearts
    14 years ago

    What I am curious to know (and think you must wonder, too) is why a boyfriend of 2.5 yrs wouldn't want to go to the same college as you? If the answer is that they are close together or that your college doesn't offer the degree he seeks then it is acceptable. If it is any other reason- I would seriously consider where this relationship is heading. It also seems like there is a trust issue going on. You say that he likes the clubs and it seems that you would not trust his behavior at these clubs. Maybe your head is already telling you that something is not right here. If I was in your situation and my bf did not want to be around me and near me then I would seriously consider his motives. You are correct in questioning his motives...

    As for the friend- i wouldn't mention that in my argument b/c you can't control who he hangs out with and that will only cause a lot of strife in the relationship--- making your friend a haven for anytime he wants to talk badly about something you have done.

    Like ollieo and mtnw said--- I wouldn't try to change his mind, but I would ask tough, direct questions.

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  • mtnw
    14 years ago

    if you aren't in college yet, then i am thinking that maybe two different schools might really be good for you. also, long distance relationships, should you two choose to stay together is really really hard. you'll see. if you try to get him to change his mind, he might, but will probably end up resenting the pressure and control.

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    Ask directly where you stand with him as a couple and what he expects. Make sure you are clear with one another & on the same page on what to expect. Is it over, a long distance relationship, do you date others in between ... what?

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