Is it normal that my boyfriend compliments other girls but not me?

I am a 20 year old woman and I have been in a relationship with my older boyfriend for one year now. I adore him to bits and we have always been very compatible in terms of our personalities and common interests. Even when we have the occasional fight we are almost always able to resolve it quickly. We live about 200 miles apart and cannot see each other every day, but we do see each other about once a month (for one weekend) and I've always been happy with him on a physical/sexual level as well.

However, there is an issue that I have started to have lately, and that is his lack of compliments and/or praise for me. I have noticed a few instances of him complimenting other girls though. We are registered members on a social website and I saw him leave a comment on one girl's photo, telling her that she had a very pretty face. A few weeks after that, I noticed that he was exchanging photos with another girl on Skype, and he wrote to her expressing how good-looking he thought she was.

Meanwhile, I've tried nearly everything I can just to read or hear something nice from him and I am nearly at my wit's end! Even though we have been together for a year, I try not to "slack off" on my appearance; I make an effort to dress up nice, put on a little make-up, and fix my hair whenever I can (especially when I am visiting him in person). I have complimented him many many times, calling him handsome and amazing, and I constantly express how lucky I am to be with him. I've dropped some not-so-subtle hints, even saying "I would love it if you complimented me more often; it would make me so happy." When I ask him what he thinks of the way I look, he'll either say "okay" or "good" very quickly as if to brush it aside. I cannot understand why he is now unwilling to reciprocate my actions. I have seen other guys constantly reassure their girlfriends that they are the best and make them feel like princesses. I do not feel that way anymore when I'm with my boyfriend -- he used to be much more affectionate in the first few months of our relationship but that has diminished over time. I realize that the "honeymoon phase" of a relationship does not last forever, but he has gone from lots of love and praise to barely anything at all now.

I've been trying to brush this issue off for a long time now and pretend that it doesn't bother me, but my heart would like to tell me otherwise as it is emotionally painful for me to see him leave praises for other girls while leaving me out in the cold. I Skype with him nearly every day with the video on, so he has plenty of chances to say something nice to me even when we are not physically together. The compliment wouldn't even have to be about my appearance; I would be happy to accept anything at this point. What should I do?

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15% Normal
Based on 99 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • RoseIsabella

    You never know, but he might be cheating on you already.

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  • la_uva_mojada

    this is a red flag that he is not interested in being a one woman man. He's interested in a multitude of women. He's taking you for granted.. FUCK HIM! You should start thinking about other dudes.. make plans with them and if he bitches about it ell him to go hang out with that bitch he complimented on facebook or wherever. If it's to the point he doesn't care he flirts with other girls than you find evidence of it more than once?!?!? WHAT AN ASS!! This guys is a sleaze. This guy is not a keeper.. believe me, gf. If you don't, you will regret it sooner or later.

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  • lanie328

    listen to the good advice girl. i know exactly wat your going through. some not akl but somme guys like to be seen as the guy that gets all the girls and thats why they may be jealous of celebrities that have that reputaution they like the attention its the way some guys are.they think that if they dont have a gf they wont ever be alone but when they have a gf they afraid it wont work out that they dot want to put their complete self into the relationship and get hurt.so the other girls are saftey nets.and he thinks cus your far away that its a excuse to make himselffeel unalone.its usually a traumatic experience during childhood bad influence or role model showung the that behavior is normal and trying to avoid the thinking about feelings.plain and simple tis will be hard. but if you love him and know that he may be able to changeif you see him at his lowest mood of sadness andsee him look to you for comfort you will see all the damage. theres a way and chance you can help him heal and turn his lifestyle around to be a one woman man but its very hard work. if hes worth your time and you think he has potential to s top hisflirting and open up toyou ten i say go ahead and try. but if not then i think the pain will be to much

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  • Avant-Garde

    He's not worth it and, he's probably cheating you. Do yourself a favour and leave him.

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  • lunareclipse

    I'm 11 years older than you and been there done that many times. The hard cold truth is- it's not gonna get better. Once you see he's a jerk, he will only get worse and you can make it really slow dragging painful end, or you can decide right now that you deserve better and dump him. I'm sure the moment you will dump him, he'll come back crawling and try to put his best face on again, but you shouldn't fall for that. It's a temporary trick. He will cheat on you for sure if he hasn't already (probably has) and it's not normal. Also, it is not the way you look, what the hell, you don't need to put on make up to please him, my husband hates it when I wear make up, he doesn't love me any less when I do, but he finds me beautiful the way I am. I suggest you start appreciating yourself more, grow some spine and not let him walk all over you like that. Btw, you are NOT lucky to have him, he is lucky to have you.

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  • fusername

    Totally agree with la_uva_mojada

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  • robbieforgotpw

    Do u shart or even powerfart a lot?

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    • watashikara

      Holy shit you can power fart?

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    • watashikara

      Can you get lift?

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      • robbieforgotpw

        It's more like the propulsion of turbo boost and enables me to run faster than everyone else

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