Is it normal that my boyfriend ..?

65% Normal
9 Comments

Hey guys. So I'm totally hurt! My boyfriend texted me telling me that he misses the excitment and now is just really comfortable .he's worried that the spark is dying and I don't understand exactly what he means & apperently he doesn't either. He made it clear that he still loves me and he's sorry for hurting me but we both promised we'd tell eachother how we feel. It ended up in a big fight and we both bawled. He's also a very touchy feelu person and we haven't had sex in about 4 1/2 months we both agreed not to bcuz it was ruining are relationship and r future were at risk. Were both also to young and just teens. He also said repatedly that he's sorry and he loves me aswell as he reallly doesn't want to brake up and he's confused himself. Right now were cooled down but I'm still hurt inside and don't know what to do. He says it's not about the sex but then what is it!!? Help guys. What do u think? is it normal for ur bf to suddenly just say that he misses the excitment and doesn't really feel it anymore? What should i do?

Voting Results
65% Normal
Based on 46 votes (30 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • purplegirl22
    12 years ago

    I'd "brake up" with you too if I saw how many spelling errors there were in your sentences.

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    • Seustewart
      12 years ago

      Haha, I noticed that too.

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  • sugarbunnykat
    12 years ago

    Often losing the spark is caused by couples forgetting to do the little things for each other. For relationship to work and maintain a spark both parties have to always unselfishly put the other person above their needs. Only when neither take advantage of this and truly have no selfish desires can a relationship maintain that "first love spark" feeling for a long time.

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  • ccjigsaw
    12 years ago

    It's normal for the spark to die down. I'm guessing this is the 1st time it's happened to the both of you so your taking it hard, but it's a perfectly normal experience. I personally don't mind it, me and my boyfriend don't have that "spark" all the time anymore, but were very comfortable and happy together. I guess what i'm trying to say is that it's not all about the spark and the desires and the sex. If you took all those things away, and you still think you two can be together, than I feel it's a worth while relationship. Instead of being afraid of this, embraceit and accept what is happening, talk to your boyfriend and have him be aware it's not scary, but a normal process of life. If neither of you can accept it, then I say move on. Be forewarned though, this will just keep happening.

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  • Seustewart
    12 years ago

    I believe the reason he started all this in a text message is because he was hoping you'd break up with him to make it easier. I'm wondering if he's gay and wants out of the relationship. No sex in 4 1/2 mths, he's touchy feely, he cries etc. Yep, probably a closet homo.

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    • Ellenna
      9 years ago

      Oh what rubbish! Unless you know him, how could you possibly have any idea about his sexuality?

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  • Peptox
    12 years ago

    It might either be he's afraid you're losing feelings for him or he is. He's probably hurt or something along those lines. Try to talk to him in person in a calm mature way and listen to what he has to say.

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  • Ellenna
    9 years ago

    You're both really young, right? Then you probably don't realise that relationships get past the crazy "in love" stage (it's called limerance, look it up) and either die or grow into something more solid and lasting. At your age it'll probably fizzle out, but hey, it was fun while it was fun, wasn't it?

    Some people do have a tendency to assume that when the "spark" fades there's nothing left; well, sometimes there isn't and sometimes there is, but that "first fine careless rapture" is a stage that can't last for ever.

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  • klokked
    12 years ago

    @sugarbunnykat, that's exactly what needs to happen.

    Also. Jump his bones. Sex is perfectly normal in a relationship, and as long as it doesn't turn into a reason to be with him, it shouldn't be dragging down the relationship.

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