Is it normal that my best friend puts me down

33% Normal
16 Comments

Is it normal that my best friend makes me feel depressed and puts me down all the time about the way I look saying I have a big nose and dry hair but then when were with other friends she's nice to me and says I'm pretty? And when I got blonde highlights in my hair she kept saying I was ginger and my hair looked horrible but every one else was saying my hair looked amazing, she's never happy for me like when I did well in my exams I've been best friends with her for 5 years so its hard to see her not in my life but I just can't trust her she steals and started smoking she has completely changed! I don't know what to do I spoke to her about it so many times but she just gets offensive and thinks I'm trying to be horrible.

Voting Results
33% Normal
Based on 45 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • carly95
    11 years ago

    I know this is hard to hear, but you definitely need to lose contact with her! She sounds extremely jealous of you to begin with. There are better people out there that are willing to be your friend. You really don't deserved to be treated that way. Good luck sweetie :)

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    she sounds jealous, best friend? friend? no

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  • curiouskate101
    11 years ago

    maybe she just teases u because she doesnt think u take offense to it? did u try telling her how it makes you feel? tell her she will stop if shes y.our friend if she doesnt time to fnd new friends.

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  • CloverFish
    9 years ago

    If your 'friend' is never there to celebrate good things that happen to you, but never misses a chance to berate you, they're not actually a friend.

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  • rachel0013
    11 years ago

    You need a new bestfriend that's all there is too it my best friend is so awersome I would do anything for her and she would do the same never make fun that's just wrong sorry girl! Send me a mesg if u wanna be friends

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    • hiyalay
      11 years ago

      My best friend was like but she's changed now sadly

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  • KelbelBlabka
    11 years ago

    It is normal but only because she's not a true friend shes a jealous person who is putting you down to make her self feel better the sooner you chose to stop hanging round with her the better friends are ment to be honest I get that but she's just being spitful - well done with your exams btw

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  • MsWVgal
    11 years ago

    She's not your friend. She puts you down, she's rude and selfish. Why stay around someone who makes you feel bad? You can't make her change, but you can certainly change your situation by avoiding her.

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    • hiyalay
      11 years ago

      I know but its complicated because me and my best friend share a friend that were both close with so it would be awkward for that friend if me and my bestfriend fall out

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      • robbieforgotpw
        11 years ago

        You don't deserve that treatment. She is fake around others. I bet you're a great person that she's jealous of. Dismiss her insults and maybe dish them back at her.

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      • MsWVgal
        11 years ago

        Your friend's relationship with the person in question is not what you should worry about. Friends fall out all the time - just don't put the mutual friend in a tough spot, and there will be no problems.

        Answer this question: do you enjoy spending time with this person, or is it emotionally draining?

        Think about it. You know what you should really do. You don't have to abruptly say "I hate you go away!" but you can stop actively spending time with the person that makes you feel bad.

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        • hiyalay
          11 years ago

          I know but what if that other friend chooses my best friend then I will have no friends and its weird because she's not always horrible sometimes we have fun and she's really nice I just wish she was like she was before

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          • robbieforgotpw
            11 years ago

            Better no friends than fake ones

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          • MsWVgal
            11 years ago

            Why does the other friend need to choose at all?

            I'll give you an example. I used to be very close to a girl, call her Kit. We were inseparable since 6th grade. But Kit got a little odd in high school. She liked to influence my choices a lot, then later tell me I should abandon the idea. She kinda treated me like her "pet project" bc she loved fashion and girly stuff, but I didnt.
            So once she introduced me to this guy and we became her project to hook us up. And of course, we started dating, but soon after she decided to start telling me hes worthless etc etc. But then she did something unacceptable - started telling my bf very personal things about my past relationships, that he had "big shoes to fill" in the bedroom, that sort of stuff.
            It really upset me, because the details she gave him were things told in confidence, and because she was going out of her way to sabotage our relationship. So after all the past toying i decided i was done with her. I haven't spoken to her since. Now, we still share a circle of friends, but I never brought it up to them (its not their problem) so there was never a problem of "choosing sides."

            I hope this story brings a little enlightenment. Don't put up with anyone like Kit - in the long run it'll just hurt you.

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  • BubbleKitten
    11 years ago

    That sounds like a very unhealthy relationship. I know it is hard, but you need to stop being friends with her.
    She's just hurting out, and you don't deserve that.
    Find a friend who really cares for you, and who won't put you down to make herself feel better.

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  • Ipooprainbows
    11 years ago

    she is obviously JEALOUS!! can't you see that, it's soo easy to read. Sadly she is one of those people who feels better when putting another person down. And she is offensive because everything you say about her manor is true and is simply reflecting to her.

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