Is it normal that my appearance affects me this much?

65% Normal
4 Comments

My appearance has a tremendous impact on my self-concept, self-esteem, body image, confidence you name it. I am almost 20 and find myself hating all my flaws (my thighs, pimples, body shape, etc.). It has gotten to the point where I avoid mirrors and take showers in the dark because I do not want to see myself. It helps me because in my head I can pretend to be beautiful because I am not obsessing about my looks, but on the outside if I even glance at myself in the mirror I become repulsed.

Beauty plays a big role in life. Overall it makes you feel more confident. I feel like I am so unconfident that it shows in my work, school, my job, I could go on. But until I feel like I am beautiful on the outside, I will not feel better on the inside.

I almost think that my background has made me this way. I was bullied in middle school throughout high school, this has greatly impacted my confidence and social skills. I am not asking for sympathy, but I do need some advice as to how to overcome my worst fear, a fear of how I look. Thanks. And no rude comments please.

Voting Results
65% Normal
Based on 43 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • PboDude
    11 years ago

    Can't you take steps to improve you apearance? Diet? Go to the gym? Make up? Cosmetic surgery? Your probly not as bad as you think any way, a few negative comments and its easy to develop a complex.

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  • bananaface
    11 years ago

    Well, since I obviously don't know what you look like, it would be weird for me to comment on your appearance. Feeling insecure about your appearance is completely normal, though. I think most people exaggerate their own flaws, when other people might not even notice them.

    I don't know what advice I can give you other than stop pretending. You have flaws, so does everyone else, embrace them. Stop acting like they don't exist, it really doesn't help. Seriously, I bet everyone has something they dislike about their appearance. I know I do.:) It doesn't mean I can't be happy about the way I look, though (which I sort of am).

    Either way, beating yourself up about the way you look isn't going to change a thing, is it? So why bother? It's clearly not making you happy.

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  • Gracethefirst
    11 years ago

    Well first you can hang arouund people that you are used to and then put on a little makeup and don't ever get surgery!

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  • Soup1090
    11 years ago

    I am a couple years younger than you but when I was in my early teens I was very disappointed with my looks. I still think and know that I am rather far on the ugly side. However, as hard as this is, I realized that I couldn't change how I looked and that I didn't care what other people thought. I have applied this to many things like auditioning to not get nervous and it is a huge improvement. I still don't like the way I look but I stay in great shape and am a rather happy guy now. One of my brothers friends told him I was like the popular football star in high school and could get any girl I wanted. Doubtful veracity but still others won't think you are so unappealing as evidenced by this. Don't waste time worrying about what you can't change!

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