Is it normal that i was upset by this?

Sorry, it's kinda long. My boyfriend recently (about a month ago) got a new job and my place is closer to it than his place is. Sometimes if he works late one day and relatively early the next, he'll stay the night. He's always very sweet towards me when I meet him in the lobby and seems like he never wants to leave when time comes for him to go to work... except this last time.

He came over at midnight, obviously a very late shift which I didn't mind, but didn't even hug me, kiss me, or smile at me until we got back into my apartment. Once we got in I ordered dinner like I told him I would if he came over. We ate while watching his show of choice, as always. About half an hour after we were done, I made it very obvious that I wanted a bit of intimacy.. and he brushed me off which is anything but normal for him, then he basically decided that we were going to sleep at 2 am. The next morning he had to be at work for 10. It takes him 10 minutes to get ready, then 20 minutes to get there. We agreed that waking up at 9 would be fine for both of us, especially since I needed sleep as I had an exam that day and wanted to be well rested. I was woken up by him moving around at 7:30, getting ready for work. I laughed, said "what happened to 9:00?" and he said "That's too late. I don't like rushing."

The way that the place I live is set up, you have to sign overnight guests in and out and they have to give a piece of ID. Not even 2 minutes after he was dressed he asked, almost angrily, "well, aren't you going to get dressed? I need my ID." I got up, got dressed, then told him I just wanted to brush my teeth and hair. As I closed the bathroom door behind me, he said "do you have to? whatever, don't take too long." I gave him the leftovers from my dinner that I didn't eat so he could have lunch, even though he knew I was really looking forward to it for my own lunch. He didn't even say thank you. As he left, he finally noticed I was upset and I explained that I felt kind of used for food and shelter. He pretty much rolled his eyes and said I was being crazy. Didn't kiss me or hug me goodbye and just left. I was hurt for the rest of the day.

He's been fine since then so I'm over it but.. I don't know. We've been together a year and a half. Is it normal to feel hurt by this stuff?

Voting Results
91% Normal
Based on 11 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • RoseIsabella

    Don't be at his beckon call. Tell him if he's gonna be weird and moody you've got better things to do than provide free room and board.

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  • ChocolatePrincess

    Its pretty obvious that he had a bad day that day and didn't want to be bothered by you. He's a man he's not going to tell you his feelings its fucked up that he was taking his angered out on you. But next time I would ask him what's wrong instead of moping around because he thinks everything is fine and dandy now.

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    • Really, it is fine and dandy now. I'm over it. I also really don't do well when I don't get a full 7 hours of sleep, so that probably enhanced my sad feelings. He said he'd had a great day, was even praised in front of coworkers by his manager, but even then if he didn't want to be bothered by me he shouldn't have come to MY apartment and let me pay $50 for dinner.
      (sorry that sounds really mad, I don't mean to be bitchy towards you, the idea of him coming to my place and letting me spend my money but not wanting to be "bothered" by me kinda irks me lol)

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  • ChocolatePrincess

    Yeah I get what you're saying but like I said again in his man world brain it hasn't even came to him to what he just did to you was screwed up. He had a bad day but didn't want you to know what was happening so that's why he still came over. He didn't want to interact with you as much because he was irritated and didn't want to be bothered. But he won't tell you this so he just acts like an ass the whole time. he's nice to you now which is his way of saying "I'm sorry". Try not to over think this situation and turn it into a problem next time he does this again ask him what's his problem.

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    • Thank you :) I appreciate the advice.

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