Is it normal that i want more attention from my husband?

73% Normal
5 Comments

I feel like he doesn't care about me or pay attention to me until it's convenient for him. I feel guilty feeling this way, because he's a good husband and he takes care of me and is sweet when he DOES pay attention to me, but its just.... never enough.

He'll sit and play a video game for 6 hours straight and barely say a word to me no matter how long i try to get his attention, so I give up. I get sad and realize it's not gonna happen, so I find something else to do. Then when he gets bored of his game, he acts like I should just drop everything and hang out with him now that he's bored. I feel like I'm a last resort, like spending time with me is his last choice on a list.
Another thing that bothers me is that he talks to the cats during this time... Like he pays no attention to me, but if one of the cats walks over, he picks him up and cuddles him and talks to him, and being jealous of a cat just makes me feel like even more of a psycho.

Part of me thinks I should just get over it since he's good to me and everything, it's not like he doesn't love me. I'm just so sick of feeling depressed and lonely in my own home when my husband is sitting next to me...

Voting Results
73% Normal
Based on 33 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • seekelp
    9 years ago

    You two should get couples counseling.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    There's probably more going on here than what you've mentioned in your post.

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  • (s)aint
    9 years ago

    The way you describe it he doesn't make you a priority. And since he can give attention to the cats he's hardly that sucked into the games ...
    Talk to him, demand more attention because YOU deserve it.
    Women have it easier finding new men than vice versa so he's the one with the most to lose from losing you.

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  • KeepsakeDoll
    9 years ago

    Initiate things yourself.

    Try hugging him from behind while he's playing, or ask for him to cuddle you, too, when he pays attention to the cats.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    You're in a tough situation. What you need to ask yourself is, do you really feel like he's deliberately ignoring you? Or is he just relaxing with a video game in his spare time? He's your husband, you live together, you're already his first priority. Any spare time the two of you have, you're already spending it together by being in the same house. You fall asleep next to him and wake up next to him. He's already yours, and him playing a game isn't him ignoring you, unless he literally doesn't ever give you attention and spends every free hour at home gaming, every single day. I've been living with my boyfriend for just over a year now, and he loves gaming. Granted, he will not spend hours and hours gaming and he always holds me and talks to me while he's busy, but I don't take offense when he wants play games and I know that just me being next to him is enough. Ask yourself, does him gaming negatively effect your relationship? It can be very easy to over react, the trick is calming down and thinking about it rationally before letting it upset you.

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