Is it normal that i usually have to force myself to cry?

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2 Comments

K so for example, a couple years ago a cousin of mine passed away. When we got the news, my cousins, sisters, and mofamily just lost it. They screamed and cried,but my tears just didn't come naturally. At his funeral, I had to keep forcing myself to cry. There were times, when I was alone, I really cried for him. He was like a brother to me growing up and before he died, it had been months since I had seen him. I was emotional and sad, but when it came to being around people I had to force myself to cry. I didn't want to seem like a freak not crying. He was one of those guys that just touched people's hearts in ways not many people can. Not to sound cheesy but it's true. So of course everybody was just crying and crying, so I didn't want to feel "left out" Yeah. That's exactly how I felt. At my own cousin's funeral, the main thing I could think of was ways to not feel "left out" For other sad occasions, if a bunch of people are crying, I try to force myself to cry to not seem weird. Only if a lot of people are crying, otherwise I don't really try. It's not like I can;t cry for real, but most of the time when I do, it's just because others are doing it. Is this wrong?? Is this normal?

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83% Normal
Based on 29 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • Koda
    12 years ago

    Believe it or not hysterical crying is not natural. Grief is a pretty dangerous, stress inducing emotion to feel. Never feel guilty when you don't cry when you think you should. Stress affects everyone differently, and can even affect the same person differently on separate occasions.

    You may cry when your cat dies, but not cry when your sister dies. Who knows why. But that doesn't have to mean you cared about your cat more than your sister. It's also normal, and perfectly OK, NOT to feel strong emotions after a death. This sounds rather cruel, but in a way, even heavy emotion can be thought of as selfish.

    Sometimes, if someone is sick, you feel relief when they die. If they were suffering, it's a healthy thing to feel. This cousin of yours, you obviously loved him, and that's all that matters. Emotions don't prove anything. If you know in your heart that you love someone, and they die, you'll keep on loving them after their death, whether you felt sad, mad, happy, or whatever.

    Tons of emotions can be associated with death; shock, guilt, disgust... the list goes on.. but just know, you should never have to apologize for the way you feel.

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    • iGetDizzy
      12 years ago

      Totally agree with your comment, made complete sense.

      And btw,I can't cry like "normal" people do either, I have to kind of force myself to aswell I don't know why cos I'll be equally upset as someone and I'll be hurting inside but I find it a challenge to bring tears to my eyes.

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