Is it normal that i think that there is logic behind (true) love?

81% Normal
15 Comments

So, it seems to me that people think that "love" is not supposed to be rational. That you just "feel" something that cannot be explained and you just fall for someone.

Well, for me I think that this is true to certain extent. Chemistry is just something that cannot be measured. However, I think that relationships based only on this feeling doesn't really have true love.

I think that true love is when you can actually realize that the other person is the best option for you and that being together would truly improve your life in many ways. It might sound stupid now, but I thing that even having certain skills can take part in this.

I think that it doesn't matter who you are with, eventually the excitement will fade away. So for a relationship to last I guess that you actually have to like the other person as a human being in general, be comfortable in their company doing non-sexual activities and even be best-friends.

So, what do you think? Is is normal to think this way?

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 31 votes (25 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • AbnormallyAwesome
    10 years ago

    Very interesting.
    Still there's something wonderfully mysterious about love.

    I remember talking to some friends of mine about how they met their significant other. Two were a young married couple and the guy said he baiscally felt like it was a good option, so he talked to her and she agreed and so they got married. That was nice but still... kinda cold.
    Then another man, he was about 70, told us his story. It was a very simple one about trying to hold his crush's hand but because he was so nervous he could only grab her sweater, and how after a while she said he could hold her hand for real now if he wanted.
    That little story almost made me cry because in the way he told it I felt all the love this man still had for his wife after all those years. It was something far greater then I could rationally explain.

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  • thegypsysailor
    10 years ago

    Wow, what a clinical way to envision love; "true love is when you can actually realize that the other person is the best option for you and that being together would truly improve your life in many ways." This is calculation, not love. Love is throwing caution and calculation to the wind; being irresponsible and going against every reasonable thought.
    Your vision of love seems more a calculated and well designed plan.
    Your way may indeed make more sense, but then again, when you are in love, sense has very little to do with anything.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Love doesn't really have a common definition I guess. But for me, love is when you feel like you can share your life with another person.

      It doesn't need to be cold mathematics, you can still fall for people like a 12 year old schoolgirl. But you know, after certain age, the difference is that it is easier to look beyond the infatuation and notice people's flaws. And let me tell you, at some point you will prefer much more someone who is actually reliable than someone who gives you "butterflies in your stomach".

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      • Riddler
        10 years ago

        Also adults who want to have sex with little kids have mental issues. They are insane and their brains do not function properly.

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      • Riddler
        10 years ago

        Well you do not know what true love is than. True love is not realizing you are going to be better off with the person. That is not TRUE love that is a logical conclusion you came to in your head.

        Just because this person is better for your future does not mean you LOVE them. That is kind of like what people do in an arranged marriage. They are doing it for benefit of themselves or for others not because they LOVE the person.

        They present this concept in many films which makes it very surprising that you believe that an arranged marriage and a marriage out of love is the same exact thing.

        Its not! Love can be explained scientifically and is a combination of biological reactions, psychological response and physical need. This is also what determines your sexuality so it can scientifically be explained but that does not mean its based on what is necessarily the best option for your future.

        If a female can marry a rich husband she might be set for life. However that does not mean her needs are going to be completely met. People when getting together need the right type of chemistry. They need to be able to feed each others needs. Now this does not just mean SEXUAL it means psychological.

        If someone is treated poorly by everyone she considers a part of her life and someone comes and treats her like a princess. Well guess who she is going to go for? That one person. Despite how ugly, fat, flawed, poor he is. Now someone who is rich might come along but either not meet her needs or just be a complete dick. Now her future might not be as good with the poor man but she is probably going to have better psychological health with this person.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          10 years ago

          I was about to write you a nice long response... but I decided it is not worth it. I don't understand you and you definitely didn't understand my post or my comments either.

          You are opposing me in your first lines, to then just support the main idea of my post thorough all your paragraphs. You should try to analyze better what you read before contradicting people.

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          • Riddler
            10 years ago

            Love is psychological/emotional and not economical/financial. Its a CALCULATION NOT LOVE.

            RICH PERSON(Calculation), Poor sweet guy(LOVE). That is the difference.

            You don't understand what love is. Its not "I will be better off with this person 10 years from now" like you believe. Its "This person makes me happy".

            You are probably never going to understand this. Since you are incapable of seeing things from another point of view. Look at it from a psychology point not a economical point.

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            • Anonymous Post Author
              10 years ago

              You certainly don't know how to debate at all, and that makes me quite sad, because you will have arguments with loved ones for no reason.

              When did I even mention the financial issue? I just said that love is about being with someone reliable and someone that improves your life. Obviously, being happy and having a good psychological health is also an improvement on life.

              Now go and read a book about how to discuss with people in a mature way.

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  • dom180
    10 years ago

    I completely agree. For me, a feeling like love could never be true and perfect if I had to turn my brain off to make it work. I could still be in love, but it wouldn't be "true love".

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  • Fall_leaves
    10 years ago

    I think people strive to have that relationship. The person you love should exist in every aspect of your life. They should be your bestfriend and the person you can be yourself with.

    Everyone that walks into your life has something to offer. When you can experience life in a new way and it's because of this one person that led you to feel, then you should know it's worth holding on to.

    I think all of what you explained is part of love. You can be bestfriends or like a person without being in love, and you can be in love without being bestfriends.

    Relationships don't last because you're bestfriends with your partner or because you improve eachothers lives. It sadly doesn't work out like that, there comes a time when even those things can't hold a relationship together. It takes a lot of time and energy that most people don't want to give.

    Yeah I think it's normal.

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  • MysticLane
    10 years ago

    I agree because I do not think "love" is a real emotion. I think that the sensation you feel when you're attracted to someone and like their personality eventually dulls out. That's why it's better to base relationships off of logic or else they probably won't last.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    10 years ago

    Believe it or not, there is a psychology, chemistry and even an evolutionary theory behind love and it's workings. Love, in and of itself, is rational, however, the things that love will have us do in order to please or keep a partner (the way women will get pregnant to try to keep a boyfriend or men will get into fights with other men out of jealousy) can become very irrational indeed.

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  • 69
    10 years ago

    part of what you say about love is true but thinking that someone is "the best option for you" has nothing to do with love. that's cold detached logic, it's a thought not a feeling. love is illogical and inexplicable

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  • Erik963
    10 years ago

    Yes there is a logic. It is called replication.

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  • Tommythecat.
    10 years ago

    Maybe we don't know everything about anything or anything about everything.

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