Is it normal that i think dating is wrong?

28% Normal
10 Comments

I'm 19 years old and I've thought that dating is wrong my entire life. My parents divorced when I was 5, but are still good friends. I was raised in a very loving family, but I was always exposed to the idea of "your parents/grandparents are basically GODS". You always need to put them first. I have done that all my life but now that I'm getting older, im tired of always doing things for other people. When I was in grade school I was bullied pretty badly and was constantly told to go kill myself. My parents are both fine with me dating, and when I see a couple, I feel that urge in my stomach. When I watch movies and a love scene comes on, I get butterflies. I have a bodily urge to be with somebody, and there are people who've asked me out, but I just can't. It's like there's a voice in my head saying "no, you can't, it's wrong, it's bad" One time I went to a party and a guy started dancing with me and I told myself to just give it a chance, so I did, then the guy started grinding on me for a bit and then thankfully the song ended, but later that night I felt absolutely disgusted with myself and I felt like I was a slut. My mom and I have the best relationship, shes my best friend, so when I think of dating I tell myself "who needs a guy when I have my mom" and I also think to myself that if I get a boyfriend then I will be leaving my mom behind and start loving someone else. Im also against sex before marriage. The problem is that my body wants it but my mind is like "NO". I have never kissed anyone or been on a date. I'm still a virgin, but I'm not raring to go and have sex. I just want to know if anyone else feels the same, like their heart is saying "I want a relationship" but their mind is saying "absolutely not, out of the question, you can't". It's almost as if I have my own little mother in my head.

Voting Results
28% Normal
Based on 94 votes (26 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • imadragon
    10 years ago

    What's the harm with dating?

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  • [email protected]
    11 years ago

    I was constantly told to go kill myself while I was in grade school too.

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  • Ryan556
    11 years ago

    I fell th same even tho I have a gf my brain is killing me for it it dosent want a relationship but my body urges for somebody to be there I get how you fell just give it a try kiss a guy you well like it (kiss kiss)

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    Wait for the right person, then they come along, don't pass it up.

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  • pastpresentfuture
    11 years ago

    i too had the same feelings growing up. my mother was very close to me as she divorced my father and i was the only male figure in her life so i felt that if i had a girlfriend that would hurt my mom in some weird way. i didn't kiss a girl till i was 17 and i didn't have a girl friend till i was 21. but i have girls flirt with me all the time and i feel uncomfortable because for some reason i think its wrong. i do have sexual urges but i never act on them. heck, i rarely even talk to girls. but i can be very flirty and charming but once they start getting serious i back away because for some reason it feels wrong. as if i am waiting on mrs right or something. idk. just because your dating doesn't mean you have to get physical or even kiss for that matter. don't do anything you don't want to do. but i say put yourself out there. don't hang around guy that grind you. find a good guy that wont pressure you. find a guy that is patient like you are. that might be what you need in a man. good luck. you are normal. you are just very close to your mom.

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  • Wendell
    11 years ago

    Don't you'll turn into that crazy cat lady!

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  • Taas
    11 years ago

    Edit- its possible these feelings will go away if you keep dating and it becomes something you feel comfortable with. Please don't deprive yourself of a relationship. Mine is the most important part of my life

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  • Taas
    11 years ago

    I am not sure if it's normal, but when I first started having sex, I felt disgusted with what I was doing and I felt it was wrong. I quickly got over this as I started to do it more, so it's

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  • Mmmpfh
    11 years ago

    I voted this as not normal even though I feel similar. I just don't think its common. I hate dating and the only way it works for me is if I know the person I'm dating a good bit and there's an obvious connection.
    Seriously though, don't do anything you're uncomfortable with just to be normal. If I decided to dance (which would never happen in reality but let's just imagine) and the person I was dancing with starting grinding against me then I'd feel the same way.
    If you meet someone you get along with really well and they ask you out, give them a chance if you feel like it. Being in a nice relationship is a great feeling!

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  • Cakeytara
    11 years ago

    I think if you tried to date someone you would be very happy and you can't leave your mom behind she is there for life<3 you should give it a shot everyone dates it's apart of daily life!

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