Is it normal that i take disrespect very personally?

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6 Comments

Initially I'm a very chill-minded guy, and have the capacity to be very kind. But if I'm disrespected I'll automatically flare up at this. It's something I won't take sitting down. I think it's because all I've been through because for such a long time I was looked down on and talked down to and that's when I was my nicest, like way too nice I'd consider the feelings of everything. Like when they say someone wouldn't hurt a fly that was literally me. I loved everyone no matter how wrong they did me. Then I snapped after so much abuse and now the slightest overlay of disrespect or attitude towards me makes me lose all calm. I guess my question isn't so much is it normal although that is the question to an extent but I guess it's more how can I control this? I still deep down try to be really considerate and at the center of my being I constantly long for harmony, peace, equality, and love for everyone but that gets covered by all the underlying and constant anger and angst. my fuse has been shortened so damn much. Like even if I'm happy there's always a tinge of anger hanging on waiting to inflate and burst to the forefront like an all consuming flame engulfing whatever hint of happiness I'm enjoying at that moment. I think that goes with my other question and makes whatever condition that was even more severe. But on some level I'm always silently hurting in some way and I've tried to kill myself before. I've been so close and it was really scary and wow this has deviated so far away from the original question at hand.But whatever. This is what I'm discussing now. But yeah I told myself I won't do it and that's a promise if nobody else can truly hold me accountable I just said fuck it. I'll do it. But yeah, my question and life and everything's vaguely right here :/ I don't even know what you'd call this actually I guess venting but also a question any help s appreciated.

Voting Results
82% Normal
Based on 22 votes (18 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    As somebody who has earned his living as the boss of some pretty tough men (seamen on ships), I can tell you without a doubt that respect must be earned and is never given. If someone is disrespecting you, then it is you who has not earned their respect, not they who are disrespecting you.

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    • 7th-and-seldom
      9 years ago

      this is truly a puzzle. the thing is i dont know, i guess the thing is i try even after all the stuff ive been through since i was a little child i still strive to be the best i can be to people and people often appreciate it but those who dont tend to cause my frustrations to blow up because i see all the people who've hurt me before, and all those times i was left not able to understand why they'd hurt me. it takes me back to every instant, every emotion. and i feel this wont happen to me again without whatever consequence coming that im empowered to serve. because for so long nobody was there. this is also sometimes why if i see someone else sad like me or on the path to being that way, you know that person who no matter how hard they try gets thrown away i get really defensive of them because nobody should have to feel such sadness in my opinion and im like you WILL NOT do to them what people have done to me. I refuse to let you make them feel that way.

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    • Darkoil
      9 years ago

      I understand what you are saying, what about if you have only just met the person though?

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      • thegypsysailor
        9 years ago

        Common courtesy and respect are not the same thing. Why would you expect a complete stranger to respect you? We should all expect common courtesy from that stranger, though, don't you think?

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        • Darkoil
          9 years ago

          There must be a UK-US difference in how the term is commonly used.

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    I got over this by getting myself in this meditative like trance. I was reading up on Buddhism and practicing the some of the main tenants when this feeling took me over. I was so at peace with myself and the universe. It felt like I was one with it. Nothing matter. Even now, if people have an issue with me, I don't care. If they disrespect me, I still don't care. It is very rare that I ever care. The words are meaningless and insignificant. Negative people tend to want to inflict negativity on others. They don't seem to have anything better to do. They want to see a rise in you. They get off on it. Don't give them the satisfaction.

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