Is it normal that i resent/hate my mother so much?
I'm eighteen years old. I'll be graduating next year.
The strange thing is, I never thought I'd look forward to moving out of the house, but I do; it's because of my mom.
She constantly makes me feel bad. She calls me stupid and ugly. One time, when I was fourteen, we were going to the dentist's and I was wearing white leggings and a black t-shirt. She jeered at me and told me to change. I asked her why, and she blew up, screaming that my underwear was visible; basically, she indirectly called me a slut. I asked my younger brother and my dad if it was visible, and they both said no. The whole time, my mom was insisting that it showed, and later she told me my brother had told her the same, but denied it to me.
This is one of the many similar things that she has said to me, and I hate her for it. Every day, she tells me that I have really bad behavior.I tell her the same thing, but she ignores it (I wish I could do the same, but it's different; she's my mom). She makes me feel clueless and horrible, and whenever I cried about it, she made me feel even worse.
Those feelings have evolved to great dislike, and now hatred. All my friends adore their mothers (I don't blame them; their mother are wonderful), but I have no such attachment to mine. It makes me feel like a bad human being and a bad daughter. I'm constantly plagued with guilt for hating my mom.
Is this normal? Am I the only one who feels this way?