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I am 28 yrs old, last time I cried was about 10 yrs ago when my ex left me, it was the worst feeling and after that I never cried again. Is it normal ?
FUCK! I just wrote a page long comment only to have it not show up. I hate computers sometimes, I guess I'll write it again, probably slightly differently this time.
I went for years without crying. It wasn't until I went through some tough times until I was able to cry again. Honestly being able to let it out finally seemed to be somewhat of an improvement.
Besides my parents and ex-girlfriend I cannot think of anybody who has even seen me cry.
When I was a kid my Dad would get angry if I ever cried and taught me that crying was for sissies.
I learned to suppress negative emotions and after a while I'm not sure if I could even feel anything anymore.
I can tell I am getting better at expressing these things because not long ago I wouldn't have even wanted to talk about it anonymously on the internet.
Talking about emotions still feels a bit embarrassing.
Almost 3 years ago when I discovered this website I was going through a series of hard times.
My childhood best friend who I grew up with had recently shot himself. He was like a brother and it is still difficult to accept. I didn't deal with his death very well and was in a bad mood a lot and my girlfriend, who was my only long term relationship I've had, kicked me out. I had helped her through her cancer, suicide attempts, and basically helped take care of her for the last 4 years since she was sick and blind, but once I had a problem she wouldn't deal with it.
I'm not sure I would ever want another relationship after all that.
I moved into my mothers house and soon gave my room to my uncle who had terminal cancer while I slept in a tent. My uncle was a lot like me and he lived with us while I grew up so he was like another parent. I helped him as much as I could. He traveled a lot in his life but he never really had any friends or a girlfriend. His life seemed unfinished.
Losing so much in a short amount of time helped me feel again, but I'm still confused.
I never liked to complain and believed it to be disrespectable towards all those who are suffering in the world, but I have come to realize that letting these thoughts out helps me think of other things.
I would like to thank this website and all the users here for the support I have received. I have learned a lot about emotions and gained insight about society that I never learned anywhere else.
Awesome comment, reading it brought tears to my eyes. I was always drawn to stories written with alot of emotions. You should write man, I enjoyed reading your post. Sorry about ut best friend
Thanks. I've been writing a lot lately too. I used to not write very good but posting here all the time has given me a lot of practice and I keep a dream journal as well. I want to write stories to make into animated movies where I narrate my story over the animation.
Are you OP? It seems you can cry too after all. What is the difference of crying and tears? I'm not sure.
Well, having tears well up for a few seconds, and crying out of your stomach for a few mintues is different . no I am not OP, lol. Pls do share links of anything you wrote. I have had dozens of ideas to make movies from, that is one thing I wish to do one day, make sad movies. Make people pity the character. I like that
I'm not sure if I get the difference still.
Anyway I do not have stories I wrote online, but I keep drafts on my laptop.
Most my stories are based off dreams I've had. I've shared a few of them on this site but don't remember what posts they were on.
As far as sad movies I have a horribly disturbing story I started writing but it's mostly in my head. The timeline and different characters stories jump around a lot but I will attempt a coherent summary. I actually want to make it an animated film...
A man is losing his wife to terminal illness. He visits her often at the hospital meanwhile satisfying his sexual needs at home watching porn.
-flashback to making of porn-
pornstar girl is in film to help pay to support her sick kid. Her abusive Christian parents find out what is going on disowning her while her kid is taken by CPS and given to her parents. She decides to commit suicide jumping off bridge.
-flashfoward again-
The man drives to see his wife again. Depressed he has a couple drinks before he leaves. On his way the pornstar girl happens to jump off the bridge onto his car causing a wreak. Because of his drinking he is sent to jail.
While in jail his wife dies and he never gets to say goodbye.
Time goes by and he meets an inmate who happens to be a kid he used to bully in highschool.
Back in highschool he would sabotage his chances with girls and spread rumors about him so he could fuck his girlfriend.
The inmate tells him that because he was bullied he turned to drugs and eventually got in the porn industry to satisify his sexual needs.
It turns out he was the one who filmed the porn that the guy was jacking off to in the beginning starring the girl he killed.
Realizing his bullying caused a chain reaction of not being able to say goodbye to his wife he goes in his cell and hangs himself.
the end
I only cry when I'm alone (alone as in nobody around, lol not alone as in single)
I didn't cry for years either and then I found someone who made me feel safe. I felt ok crying around them because they cried well around me... Lol. I grew up with a family that was very condescending and competitive towards me but not each other... Kinda identify w bugs... I learned not to cry and I still can't when I'm alone because of all the aggression I experienced as a young person. Just find a friend whose a non lame kind of sap and be saps together... Maybe?!
You might just be emotionally reserved. I used to cry most of the time when I was younger, now I rarely if ever cry. I may cry on a sad song or a movie that is touching/sad/or nostalgic for me. Even if i get injured, I don't cry. That pretty much it.