Is it normal that i'm terrified to admit when someone likes me?

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6 Comments

I don't really get this, but i'm terrified of admitting somebody likes me, in the fear that they don't, and because I hate myself, I just can't believe thats true. This is despite them telling me upfront word for word that they do. This causes a problem where a girl would ask me out and I would just almost ignore it because I don't believe them, and I cannot be convinced that they do. I feel like if I give them an answer they could say something like "what? i never liked you wtf" or something.

Yesterday I was calling this girl to let her know that the feeling wasn't mutual and that I don't want to be in a relationship atm after she asked me out. and as I was speaking I was sputtering and my hands were uncontrollably shaking and I danced around the fact that she likes me. I can't say it. I legit freaked the fuck out. idk how normal this is.

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80% Normal
Based on 10 votes (8 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • [Old Memory]
    3 years ago

    It's different when you're not on the outside looking in, but this seems like it could be a self fulfilling prophecy, but I think it has a different name now

    Basically you think you're too worthless to be loved or scared to open yourself to heart break that you bring about the circumstances that maintain your single status, possibly even subconsciously, which I'm guessing plays a role since you hate yourself and I'm guessing you're still working out how/why since you're affected by it and because you also aren't deliberate in telling them no, you have an anxiety attack of sorts and lose your composure and it probably creates a dichotomy between wanting love and being afraid of it, birthing cognitive dissonance, which would explain the anxiety and the hand fidgeting and stuttering

    Do some quiet meditation, figure out the right questions to ask yourself, learn to be mentally strong

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      3 years ago

      Thank you. You really described how i've been feeling. I've been in relationships before but it never lasted too long and I couldn't bring myself to make any moves because deep down I wasn't convinced they liked me. Its like no matter what I do, for some reason I can't convince myself. but i'll try some meditation and try sitting with myself on the problem. Thanks.

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      • [Old Memory]
        3 years ago

        I'm glad I was able to help someone ☺

        You just gotta find a reason for yourself to see internal value, the right partner will see it if you really believe your worth

        Personal experience tells me you acknowledge you don't have that yet, but by talking/thinking about it you're working to find it

        You'll get there, everyone has their own unique worth, and your life will exponentially start to get better 💜

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  • Looking_through_the_glass
    3 years ago

    If your still in high school/middle school take this time to make mistakes that is when you can but when your older and don't get as many opportunities and when you do it can turn into an abusive relationship from how you describe yourself. What I'm saying is just embrace the love and there is a reason that people want partners to better themselves and love each other

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  • JellyBeanBandit
    3 years ago

    Aw dude, that's sad to hear. You need to love yourself. Please call that girl up again and go out with her (if you like her too). Even if it feels weird at first she might help to boost your self-esteem.

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  • my_life_my_way
    3 years ago

    Maybe they don’t actually like you and your feelings are right

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