Is it normal that i'm like this?

60% Normal
9 Comments

Hello, I'm a girl. The truth is I'm one of those girls who they call "no boyfriend since birth". I positively think that It's not because I don't like socializing with others, not about my looks (But I don't know if I'm beautiful to the opposite gender it's because from what I remember some of my guy friends since then never truly called me beautiful just comments like "cute girl or you look like a little girl/ little sister" kind of stuff. Oh, and sometimes I feel silly when I look at the mirror and try to examine my face, my body and all.. just to know if there is something wrong with me..) All of my friends in school already have a boyfriend and sometimes they would share stories about their private things regarding physical relationships.. I feel kinda awkward with their conversations and I feel stupid and embarassed when I ask them what they do.. Anyway, My family especially my parents are strongly against having me and my siblings a boyfriend.. not until we have a stable job and good salary.. As long as I can remember they always gave us lessons/advise regarding our future and my parents tells us things that guys likes deceiving girls all the time and the only thing they want from us is "sex" and that most of the time they would just do some sweet talking and end up fooling you or hurting you then you will become miserable.. I always put my family as my priority especially my parents in all the choices that I had and have to make when it involves them.. I always wanted them to be proud of me and to never feel disappointed. When I have to spend fun time with my friends (which are mostly girls) I'm only allowed to when the place is near our home (like a mall or restaurant, but never bars - which Ive never been to) My parents always picks me up after the exact time they'd given me to go home when I'm out with my friends.. I don't have a problem with that because I'm used to it ever since I was young and I know they only wanted what is best for me. I had some few crushes with guys when I was in highschool but I never keep them in my mind because my parents said that when you like a guy it's only in the mind and that it is not good for you.. also I've started to feel embarassed every time I think about guys and I feel weird (or shy) when a guy flirts with me.. and I end up avoiding him.. (I'm absolutely sure that I'm not attracted to the same gender) and so, when it comes to having a crush I try to focused my attention to movie actors or anime characters... Since then, I started to be a "friend only or like a little sister" kind of girl when I'm with a guy.. When I entered college (I'm currently 21 years old) I had a guy friend who wanted to date me and everytime he ask me out I end up changing the topic & again I feel awkward and shy towards him until he dated someone else... I'm not afraid of guys but I feel shy/weird/embarassed when a guy flirts or ask me out on a date.. I sometimes feel like that I'm betraying my parents when I think about: what would it be like to have a relationship or fall in love with a guy who will love you back.. Is is normal that I'm like this...? (Thank you, and sorry for my bad english)

Voting Results
60% Normal
Based on 48 votes (29 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • Shackleford96
    11 years ago

    Pro tip for next time:

    Paragraph breaks in your text make reading your story a WHOLE lot easier.

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    • casualcrow
      11 years ago

      I second this. When people see a huge wall of text it usually discourages them and they skip your post.

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  • D-reezy
    11 years ago

    I think your parents are too controlling in your life. It is your life, not theirs, so you need to live it how you want, not how they want. I don't think its normal because a girl of your age should be dating guys and stuff. Its normal, and its good for you. Getting hurt and dating are both part of life and everyone experiences it. Also, most guys aren't only in it for sex. And getting shy or embarrassed when talking to someone you like is normal, and it goes away the more you do it. So its your life, do what YOU want with it! Hope this helps (-:

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    • Millie_the_evil_saint
      11 years ago

      Maybe she doesn't want to be with guys yet? Why do girls have to date at that age? She's mentioned she's studying. There are a lot of things girls can pursue at that age. Doesn't have to be only love. Girls have brains too, you know...

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  • fpssource
    11 years ago

    Im 19, im pretty looking guy ( thats what i think ), never had a gf or had relationship with a women before. Its okay, really, because early age relationships is very troublesome and its unstable and may cause to hurt yourself " you feeling".

    But the main reason i dont have A relationship with women is that i have hyperhydrosis. I'd say it destroyed my life.

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  • Millie_the_evil_saint
    11 years ago

    You're very lucky to have such parents. True, they might be overly protective, but actually they're right about guys. Guys are not interested in gooey romantic "love", and relationships between young people tend not to be lasting.<BR><BR>What you need to ask yourself is what you want from life. If that is a stable family in the future, a man who loves you, kids? Then listen to what your parents tell you, and stay away from guys untill you're out of college.<BR><BR>If you don't really care about having a family, if you're okay with having many (but not very lasting) relationships, then get with a guy now.<BR><BR>I don't know and can't tell you what's best for you, but I can tell you one thing: the choice you make must be your own. You're too old to just do something because you want to "please your parents". If you decide to be abstinent, make a conscious choice. The choice is yours. It is your life, after all. Just know that every choice has its consequences...

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  • Sog
    11 years ago

    You need a job and a car. No more of this "parents pick me up" stuff.

    It's true that your parents are very controlling, but most of the reason is that you allow them this great power by having them take care of you.

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  • keef
    11 years ago

    Woah.

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  • suckonthis9
    11 years ago

    Your parents are very strict, this I can see.

    They are partially correct, in that, some males will do almost anything in order to have sexual relations with you.

    In order to overcome this, my advice, is when a male that you like makes comments or innuendos (says your cute, beautiful, etc.), instead of brushing him off, or feeling awkward or shy about it, you should thank him and request from him an opportunity to converse (talk). Make it crystal clear to him, that this will be conversation only, for the time being.
    When you are together, in a relaxed and comfortable setting, you should explain to him the nature of your relationship with your parents (what you have written here, etc.).
    It will be both of your missions, to be able to convince your parents, that he is worthy of you. When, and only when, you are both very satisfied that you can accomplish the mission, then you should take him to meet your parents.

    You should also ask your parents nicely, whether it would be acceptable to hug and kiss a male, in a friendly way. (This is so that you might be a little more intimate with the male, while you are working on your mission, but don't tell your parents this).

    [Use male, with your parents, or it's equivalent in your native language, not boy, man, guy, etc.]

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