Is it normal that i'm in love with my sort of step-sister?

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8 Comments

I'm in love with my sort of step sister. Let me explain. My father and her mother met and fell in love and everything was fine, I still lived with my father, and his girlfriend (at the time) lived with her two daughters and I rarely saw her daughters. Then my father got sick with and died rather quickly.
I didn't find out until after he died that they were engaged and were planning on moving in together. After he died I moved in with his fiance (I'm not even sure if that's what you still call her..) and her daughters. I was very lucky to be given a place to live with a great family and I started hanging out with her daughters, specifically more a lot more than the other.
Now it's been months since I've been living here and we do everything people in a relationship would do...except we have to hide everything because fear of her mother finding out. It sucks because I've never felt this way about anyone and she hasn't either...yadda yadda yadda...what should I do? I know there's a lot to consider here and potentially screw up, but I feel like there's two major reasons why she would not allow it: 1. my father being dead and 2. I have recently struggled with depression from grief which I haven't told her about which also resulted in me making some poor decisions and am probably not going back to college next semester. What makes it worse is if my father were alive I probably would not have been given the opportunity to get as close to her as I have...
I don't know, it's pretty weird situation in my opinion, we both don't know what to do...

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84% Normal
Based on 82 votes (69 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    Yes, you're fine. Your father died but I bet he would still want you to be close to your new family. As a whole, it probably wasn't the best thing to have a relationship with the girl but if I was in your spot, I wouldn't be ashamed of it.

    You two are NOT related by blood and are just two people. You live together which is great as it shows that two CAN live together successfully. I'm happy for you and have fun.

    You didn't state your age so please tell me your close to adulthood and not in your early teens. Look on the bright side, her mom odviously likes you since she took you in and I wouldn't come out with this until later but I bet she will be somewhat more supportive than you think.

    WORSE CASE SCHENARIO, tell the mom when she finds out that you were greving over your dad and the daughter was extremly supportive and caring and it blossomed from there.

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    • [Old Memory]
      14 years ago

      I'm stupid, you mentioned that you are going to college. However, you didn't mention the daughters age and unless she is around ten years old, I think you are fine.

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  • Retard73
    11 years ago

    Dude that incest broham

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  • FluffieBunnie
    12 years ago

    It's normal, but please don't drop out of college. Fight for your education and try as hard as you can to be the best person you can be. Do that and I'm sure that your sort of stepmother will be happy that you're in love with her daughter!

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  • randomnessgirl
    13 years ago

    I don't know if this will make you feel better or worse but i think everything happens for a reason, maybe this WAS the only way of fate bringing you two together..... maybe its meant to be?:)

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  • buckshot69
    14 years ago

    Some people say that maybe you where trying to replace your fathers love with hers. This makes many assumptions on your relationship with your father. I'd have to know more to advise you on what to do. Consider also that your step mother may know about your relationship and she's waiting for you to tell her about it. Women are usually very sensitive to things of that nature. She probably already suspects. I do believe you love this girl and I don't think there is anything wrong with the two of you being together. The situation will come to a confrontation sooner or later, and personally I prefer that the situation be within my control.

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  • xoxogossip
    14 years ago

    if you really love each other, i think its romantic an sort of sexy, ajaj, sorry, maybe im do one that needs therapy

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  • gunner_recall
    14 years ago

    Its obviously a sensitive situation...

    The thing that came to mind firstly for me was that you were possibly trying to recover/replace your fathers love with that of the new partner.

    Budthewise' comment about age is absolutely correct, she should be of comparable age and certainly legal!

    It is something that you'll need to get out in the open with the mother, personally I feel having these sorts of secrets in a relationship usually ends up in its demise.

    For me, the 'sort of step sister' thing isn't an issue... you are not blood relatives at all... socially it could be see as a little weird. But even legally, because there was no marriage between your late father and his gf there's nothing in law to stop you... (im not sure if there even is in the case of them having been married anyway).

    The 2 of your should talk... cause I think it should be out in the open.

    Does the other sister know? What does she think.. ?

    Otherwise, its normal. Especially given the circumstances and that you have been around each other so intensely since you moved in.

    If anything... living with someone can really show true colours and feelings for people for good and worse... and the fact you get along so well still is a great thing.

    Couples can be together years and then move in together and it not work! So congrats.

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