Is it normal that i'm black but am not attracted to black guys?

I'm 19 .

I'm a black girl.

I don't want to date a black guy.

I guess I feel less attracted to them because I've been hurt by so many and they just seem like jerks who like to play childish games. I had to file 2 sexual harassment cases at school and it hurt so badly! Also, I feel like we don't have the same interests. I don't know. I feel racist but I haven't found one that I would date yet . It's just like sometimes when I talk to a black guy, I don't feel like a human being. But holding conversations with White guys, Chinese guys, Hispanic guys and Indian guys I feel like they're listening and paying attention and don't just see me as an object. I feel like when I'm talking to one of those guys, its like someone is giving a big hug. I feel respected as opposed to the harsh disrespect I feel from black guys.

I also feel we don't share any similar interests in much, arts, hobbies, lifestyle, etc.

I just haven't seen one with a kind heart . I can't even articulate how I feel right now. I know not all of them are jerks, but most of them are. And it means more to me to have similar interests and beliefs that physical attraction. Some times at the thought of me being with a black guy makes me want to puke. I feel so bad. I feel like I'm letting what happened in the past hurt my future, but it hurts to much even to think about it. The pain makes me sick. I wish I could move on.

Voting Results
93% Normal
Based on 60 votes (56 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • Hismilkchocolate

    Yeah it's normal...it's called a preference.
    Go for what attracts you and you'll be taking the first step in the right direction.

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  • Its_Called_Love

    You're aren't letting your past hurt your future. You're LEARNING from your past. Common respect is something that should be optional in a relationship, remember that.

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  • Andrew256

    A lot of black women I've talked to have the same mindset. I've read studies that suggest black women are advancing much faster than black men as far as education and careers go.

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  • ShreksIdenticalTwinBrother

    As a straight black guy, I feel your pain. There are too many black guys that want to act gangsta and tough and cuss and sag and crap! I don't associate myself with other black males because they already give all other black people a bad reputation. The funny thing is that I don't date black girls! Mainly because most, not all, maybe 95% of them, are loud, disrespectful, cruel and irresponsible!

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  • Anime7

    It seems like a preference. As you said you haven't met a single black guy that you like and you are aware that not all men are jerks, so I think you just have a preference for guys. This is normal. You shouldn't feel hurt for not liking guys of your race, this website is full of people who have a preference for people outside their race.

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  • Binkconito

    First of all I would like to ask is your father in your life? Secondly, are you a dark skinned black female?

    I am a biracial black female. I feel when I was your age I when through a phase. I though maybe white guys was for me. My issue was I was a nurse at nineteen, own my first home car and many black guys just did not have my thought process of success. However I feel my black father and two brothers was such strong men I knew there was black men out there for me. My issue was I tried to date white guys but sexually was not attractive to them. I settled in with a guy like my father from the Island but also of mix race. Over the years I have learned to appreciate my black guys. Be patient you will find out from the core all men or the same. There are good and bad in all cultures and race.

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  • LafayetteX

    I am one year younger than you, and I actually feel the same way about black men. I don't think it's from self experience, it's more from seeing my mother's experiences.
    I get criticized even by my family, but I can like just about any race, except black. I can think they look attractive, but the disinterest is evident. All my boyfriends have been white or mixed so far, and I assume that trend will continue.
    I've met black guys that are not like that and I feel bad, because the majority definitely affects the minority that are truly good men.

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  • snowtail802

    i like wafflez

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  • Noodleflower

    It's just a color... Who cares?! Everyone is equal Ughh raceist Are annoying

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  • Satchmo

    This is totally normal I see it all the time. I wonder if your from an urban area though. I go to college not far from where I grew up and I've found that there is a much higher percentage of respectable black men in the college scene then there is in the city and if white men said half the things I've heard black men say to women they would have a permanent handprint on their face.

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    • Well, firstly I am in University right now. I live in south ! I'm from the south, and I go to school in the south. I didn't understand that last part about white guys . I see all types of black guys where I live from many economic background but mostly middle class and lower middle class .

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      • Satchmo

        Well if u know black men from all different backgrounds I am surprised that u haven't met any you are compatible with also in your op you said you haven't met any with a kind heart. What I meant by what I said about white guys is that I've noticed black men tend to be much more overt in the way that they flirt with women and many women see this as offensive but half expect it from black men if white men were more overt these same women would be combative and offended

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  • IrishPotato

    Completely normal.
    Simple, yet efficient answer ;D.

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  • NeuroNeptunian

    I can understand that.
    I have a few mixed friends (one parent black, one parent white) that don't care much for black dudes because they find black dudes to be like baboons.

    I don't want to say that most black guys are, but most of the ones that I have met are =/

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  • Fingerninja

    I think black guys come across arrogant and think there ego is bigger than there watches

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    • ShreksIdenticalTwinBrother

      About 95% of them are like that. I'm not like that. I cannot stand guys like that!

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    • IrishPotato

      Not bigger then their so called monstercocks though.

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