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I'm 20 years old and very shy. I've never asked a girl out in my entire life so I've never had a girlfriend, kissed a girl, or had sex. Is this normal? If you have been like this in the past and come out of your shell since then please comment!
I am in the same boat man. Well, I have kissed girls before but everything else, I'm just like you and honestly, it really doesn't seem like we are the normal ones. I hate to admit. I too am very shy and have trouble talking to people. everyone says "Oh, you'll meet someone, don't worry" well, I'm worrying!
Sorry, I didn't mean to make this about me, just wanted you to know I can relate and that it can suck.
I ditn get my first boyfriend until I was 19, Sometimes people are just late bloomers.....or if your like me unwilling to settle for second best :) Dont worry you'll meet the person for you when the time is right, why waste your time stressing about it! Enjoy your life and work on your confidence and meeting new people x
As far as your specific situation, I wouldn't worry about being shy. I've known a lot of quiet, relatively shy guys who have had luck with the ladies so to speak. I wouldn't put too much stock into the guy saying that they only like loud mouth idiots. Just ignore the girls who only go for loud mouthed idiots - it reflects badly on their character if that's how they are. It has nothing to do with how pretty they are - a shitty personality does not justify looking good, anyhow.
One thing I always did wrong for the longest time was blaming every rejection on myself. Sometimes it was my fault, but a lot of the time, I've realized now, I was just after people who were totally not right for me. A lot of the time, too, I was turned down by girls with their own personal problems that had nothing to do with me - as soon as I realized that love involves two people things got better.
Just don't apologize, don't be discouraged if they say no, and don't regret asking them out. Ask them out with confidence and directness, even if you don't feel confident. It never feels good to get rejected but you have put yourself in a position where you can be rejected before you can start to learn to cope with it, unfortunately. I find it's best not to think of it as rejection - she has her own reasons and they might be something you did but they could well be total nonsense. Now don't take that as an excuse to just hate on women, or to sit around and not improve yourself in any way (knowing some psychology, how to dress, getting in shape, how to act are all definitely useful) but don't blame every single thing on yourself either.
Good luck!
I never asked anyone out either. I'm 18. But it would've been hard, because everyone I ever liked was a friend of mine... even the girl i fell in love with.
but i guess.. time will show? or something like that.
Dammit, see this is the nonsense I have been talking about, why do guys feel so much pressure when it comes to this nonsense?
We have entire generations of men sitting around thinking very strongly that something is wrong with them if they dont have a girlfriend, or arent married.
I want a girlfriend, I just have never asked a girl out....It's not so much that I'm afraid of rejection, it's just that I'm very shy and never talk to people I don't already know.
Well if you want a girlfriend that badly you are eventually going to have to talk to at least one of them at some point. If I were you I would aim low as well, I have no idea what you look like but I can tell you from experience, no matter what they say, women DO NOT like shy guys at all.
No woman wants to think they are dating a spineless shy guy. You may not be spineless but women make that association with shyness. And the prettier the girl the more she will be attracted to the confident, loud mouth idiots for whatever stupid reason they are attracted to them.
Go to college, meet a nice girl. Ask her out. You can only go up, and remember, no one is better than you. We are all equal. No shame in rejection, you just learn.