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So I see no other purpose I just want to keep losing weight I feel like killing myself if I gain. But it is weird I love ana. She is real and she is there for me. she treats me better than my own family everyone tries to take her away but I can't cope without her :/
You need to let go of Anna - let her die before she kills you. She is not your friend, she hates you and wants you to hate yourself. She is manipulative and puts wrong messages in your head. Your family loves you, Anna hates you. Get better, go to rehab and eat little by little until she dies.
This is a very hard question to give advice to. However, I think I understand where you're coming from.
Anorexia shouldn't be comforting. Anorexia shouldn't be something a person has to deal with. Anorexia shouldn't be a personified figure that understands you better than your family.
You don't have to be thin in order to be beautiful. If anything,you're probably an attractive person.
As for your family, well I don't really expect them to understand what you're going through. However, a counselor might.
I don't want you to die because of some social phobia of being rejected cause your body isn't "perfect." Nobody will care how you look if they're too sad grieving over your death.
Not eating is a fucking stupid way of becoming slim, your bodies metabolism drops way down and you become a skinny fat person.
Firstly Anorexia is a mental condition, many people die from it, Anorexia is not a he or she, it is not a person. Like I always say, food is not the problem, the thoughts are, which you need to fight. Ask yourself this honestly, will Anorexia really bring you happiness?...will it give you friends?...will it gives you a boyfriend?...will it make you are more likeable person?...are you truly happy in your current situation (honestly)?...if you answered no to any of those questions, you really need to consider and address the real underlying issue that 'Ana' seems to be masking.
Is it normal? Yep, sadly. People don't become anorexic for no reason, my understanding is that often they have some other problem, and anorexia is the only coping mechanism they know for it. And that can work for a while, but eventually it starts causing new problems, and exacerbating the original one...
There ARE better coping mechanisms out there, even if that seems impossible to imagine right now. I hope you know someone who can help you find them. A good psychologist knows it's not as easy as "well, start eating!" and will help you find solutions and ways to help you through your other problems also.
I'm exactly the same way:)
I've been told that I need help, but it usually just makes me want to lose more.
People have said I'm thin, but I don't believe them.
There's something so beautiful and relaxing about it. It's like being perfect....
I honestly thought that you were the OP, not that it's an insult to be the OP. However, what is it about anorexia that you find relaxing and beautiful? I'm sure a lot of people have told you that you're beautiful, do you believe them? Sorry if I sound like a creep or weirdo. I just frankly don't want you to die.
Trust me, you don't sound like a creep or a weirdo:) It's really nice of you to care.
In a sense, I don't really know....
I feel like the thinner you are the more closer to perfection you are. It's almost supernatural. To me, I feel like it's an art form and if I want to be loved and remembered, then I'll have to be as thin as possible.... I know then that I'll be perfect. I fear weight... Everything, looks better thin.... There's something very beautiful about it...
You make anorexia sound very supernatural and interesting. I can sympathize with what you're saying, I really can, but anorexia doesn't equal perfection. I'm not going to give you a religious speech about perfection, frankly I'm not very religious. However, I will tell you that you don't have to be thin to be loved. You mentioned to me in an earlier comment that you're very close with friends. Do you think that they like you because your thin? They like you because you're a very nice person to be with, not because you're thin. I know that practically every society accentuates being thin, but being thin isn't everything. You are beautiful in your own way! I don't mean beauty as in personality but in physical appearance. There are girls out there who have an average body and guys drool over them, believe me they do. If anything, you probably are thin and don't know it.
Gaining weight I understand can be scary, but that doesn't mean that you will get fatter from eating. One thing that you could do is moderate your food intake to a healthy status. Like only eat 3 meals a day and no snacks in between, that's what I do.
Avant-Garde you are a very interesting person to talk to and frankly I don't want you to end up in the hospital over some mentality that associates perfection with slimness. You are a very beauty person and the people in your life will remember you not for your body, but for the person you were.
It's very normal for you to think that, however it is definitely an unhealthy way to feel, no exceptions whatsoever. Even if you don't think you need this go and see a doctor about it, they're not going to lie to you and they're paid to make you healthy, it's in their best interests so they won't try to jeopardise their career by doing something which is bad for your health.