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lately i've been lonely and have been making up imaginary people to feel less lonely. all of my friends are usually busy so i have nothing to do most of the time. For some reason though i'm starting to develop feelings for one of these friends and i'm concerned if something is wrong with me. could it be that i've gone insane?
I felt like this for a while at one point. I was kind of isolated, since I was getting sick a lot and couldn't go to school. I creates these people in my mind and they kept me company when I was all alone. I started thinking of one of the people quite a bit and developed a bit of a crush on this imaginary guy.
I knew I couldn't actually be with him, so I started writing a story with all of the people I made up and a person based on myself. When I finally returned to school, I let several people in my English class read it and they loved it. They're actually still asking me to write more.
I kept the idea of this guy as my gold standard. I picked certain qualities he had and looked for them in people I dated. Maybe you should try doing that. Keep your person in the back of your mind and try to find parts of them in people around you.
At night sometimes I move to one side of the bed and imagine that someone's asleep beside me. I'm not sure if either of us are normal, but I can relate.
I would say that you are envisioning this perfect friend that will never and can never exist and are falling in love with the IDEA of that person. It is ok to know what qualities you look for, but don't sell REAL people short they are capable of some really amazing things, like being able to go have a cup of coffee with you.
It's normal and probably more common than most would admit lol. The imagination is strong and it is easy to get deluded in it. Just try to snap out of it and realize he is NOT REAL. Try talking to REAL people and connect your self to the real world. This happened to me before and I've heard about it happening to others. I believe it's the heart/brains way of dealing with loneliness. It comes up with a fake person in order to avoid reality and depression but I am not professional so i could be wrong. Most people have this happen via day dreaming.