Is it normal that i look up to thieves and murderers?

I've think of them of role models, and have thought this since I was around 8 or 9.

I don't look up to the crimes they do or their motive for doing it; I look up to the WAY they do it. Take Jack the Ripper, for example. I admire the way he could pull off those killings like a pro and not get caught. The case is STILL unsolved to this day, and I'm just amazed at how one person can lead the police on like this for years and years without being found out.

I love thieves and murderers, but I absolutely hate rapists and molesters. I actually think thieves and murderers are a step above rapists; they end a person's suffering quickly (in most cases) instead of leaving the person loathing for the rest of their life about being violated.

So, end point. It's not like I'll ever kill anyone or steal from a major bank, but I've always wanted to do something, lead people on and leave them in the dust. Making a puzzle for other people basically. I started off with small pranks when I was younger, like hiding my sister's cards or knocking over folded piles of clothes. Now, I've gone a step up and have started doing things like ripping up my cousin's business letters (which she blames her dog for) and messing up other houses by painting the back of the house a sickly color (I do it in different neighborhoods so nobody suspects anything-I feel so bad! lol).

I told my closest friend that I admired them and she now avoids me as much of she can; mainly because she's frightened. I didn't think it was that big of a deal. She's the only person I've told so far, even though I've had this interest for a long time. I remember a time when I was 11 and I was about to ask my mom about how serial killers pull off their stunts when I news broadcast came on about a killing. She started to say things like 'Murderers are terrible people' and 'I pity their victims', and I started to think my question would creep her out, so I quietly left.

I don't know if anyone else has criminal role models besides me, and I'm afraid of telling people because they'll look at me different so I didn't tell anyone about this.

IIN?