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Years ago we did play with others but her libido died. I still fantasize about watching her get fucked then eating her out
No, there was no humiliation involved and I was getting a blow job from his wife at the time.
Watching your wife get fucked is humiliating in and if itself. If not, then you don't care about her like you should.
That's your opinion. She certainly enjoyed it, and I certainly enjoyed the blow job.
As for caring about my wife, don't offer an opinion on something you have no knowledge of.
Does she know you still fantasise about the past? Why did her libido "die"? If it was because of menopause, that doesn't have to be a permanent death of libido: check out hormone replacement therapy, even in very low doses it can make a huge difference.
Lots of people find the thought of doing this very challenging or disgusting for various reasons, but you're not unique. If you were, MFM porn wouldn't be a sub-genre.
It's fine to fantasise about whatever the hell you want, and you shouldn't let the opinions of others make you feel that you need to censor your own thoughts. As long as we're not violating any laws in the real world, treating others badly or engaging in activity that does us harm, what goes on in our heads is nobody else's business.
Most guys would be enraged if some guy slept with their girlfriend. So it's weird that you find this exciting honestly, but I've heard of it enough to think it's semi common. So I guess it's normal?
This entirely depends on whether you were directly involved in the sex between her and the other man, were just a spectator being ignored and humiliated, or had a second guest in the mix. Compersion is real when all partners are directly involved. If one is made to sit on the sidelines and enjoy it, that's a place you want to move away from.