Is it normal that i keep messing shit up?

So in order for you to understand this question you need to know that:
I am a 19 year old homosexual male.
i have only been in 2 relationships including this current one.

So my thing is that I am ver confused and basicly i seek advice from just about anyone who is willing to give me some.

I've been with this guy for about a year now on and off in thebeginning he warned me that he would be bad for me because he was an asshole but me liking the idea of fixing and helping out i fell more into him

long story short I've never been so in love in my life and i could swear i would do anything for the kid i care more about him than my own family no lie and i want and am willing to spend the rest of my life with him

we have argued much even have become physical but its not a constant thing I hit him once then he hit me and since we havent we both say we love eachother and we both want to work things out but it seems that i keep fuckin up over assuming and over thinking everything some on help tell me is it normal for some one my age with such experience to be a well rounded fuck up my intentions are good and i always want the best for him so ? :/