Is it normal that i have a hard time trying to comfort sad friends?

87% Normal
7 Comments

It seems like every girl I know knows how to comfort a sad friend and cheer them right back up. I however, suck at this. I know the other persons sad and all, but it just gets awkward for me since I never really deal with drama. I just like to pat them on the back, and change the conversation. I'll maybe throw in a horrible joke or two, but that just makes me look like an ass. I'm not the advice or comfort kind of person - IIN?

Voting Results
87% Normal
Based on 47 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • somerandom
    12 years ago

    You sound just like me. Even the horrible jokes. I think I just lack emotion. Sometimes life sucks. But it does no good to cry about it

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  • 8Serene8
    12 years ago

    Normal for me. I always feel awkward comforting people when they are sad.

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  • Brynne
    12 years ago

    Be careful you don't try to minimize the problem or suggest it is something unimportant. Don't tell them to just buck up and get over it. Don't say you did it to yourself even if that's true. If they feel like their world is falling apart, saying these things won't help at all and you become someone to not count on anymore. Maybe later you can but not while their physical or emotional pain is going on.

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  • dappled
    12 years ago

    I'm normally good at this, but sometimes it's difficult. When a friend's baby died and he started crying, I felt a bit lost. I think it's because he's a man. If he was female, I'd know what to do.

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    • Jiovanie
      12 years ago

      I find it hard to comfort guys too, I can comfort girls no problem but comforting other guys who aren't....stereotypical gay is difficult. A hug usually works but sometimes it makes me feel awkward.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    You can`t be responsible for the emotions of others. Just be yourself, and that will help them alot.

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  • i_don'tknow
    12 years ago

    I think that's pretty normal. I feel quite awkward in this kind of situation too, especially if I don't know the person too well. But I think what most people need is someone to vent to and for you to actually listen.

    I often find that no matter what I say, even to my best friends, that nothing helps - try not to put too much pressure on yourself to make them feel better straight away, because sometimes they just need to get to those conclusions on their own, and in their own time - but know that your support helped them get there. A hug definitely doesn't hurt, though!

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