Is it normal that i hate my husband?

33% Normal
13 Comments

I hate my husband. Some days I want to kill him. I day dream about ways to kill him so that no one could ever link his death to me... nice little "accidents".
Really, it is one main thing I hate about him. He is a compulsive hoarder and a confirmed messie. At 50, he will not change now (I have been trying to change him for the last 15 years). He brings home other people's junk and leaves it lying around. He leaves his stuff lying around. The fridge is full is rotting food and he will not let me throw it out. I HATE THIS. The kids are turning out the same as him and leave their junk everywhere and will not clean up. If I did not pick up their junk the house would be piled high with the mess. If they make something to eat, crumbs and mess with be on the floor, all the benches, fridge left open, food left out to get flies on it etc. Only animals live like this and actually, my pets are cleaner. When I went away on training for my job the house got so filthy that my son was hospitalised with food poisoning. I can't live like this anymore and want to leave him and the kids in their filth. Problem is, I paid for the house, the cars, the pool...everything while he contributed very little. I have tried evicting him. HE WILL NOT LEAVE. Tried getting a court order, but the court does not see his filthy habits as domestic violence. - Not even when he laughs at me and says "You're the mother. You clean it up." I don't want to be his MOTHER I want to be his WIFE and EQUAL. I want him to help me clean up his crap. I am beyond cleaning it now and let it stay there. Seeing the piles of crap depress me and cause me great stress, but I know that if I clean it, within days, the crap will be back. For example, I will stack the washing ready for it to be put away and straight away, he comes and pushes the folding over so its messed up again. He needs psychiatric help, but refuses to go :-(

Voting Results
33% Normal
Based on 104 votes (34 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • gerberacaisy
    13 years ago

    I had to leave my husband for his overwhelming depression and refusal to get help, among other reasons. looking back at the way my life used to be...it sounds ridiculous. divorce isn't easy, but neither is staying. he won't change if you are there to clean up after him. get a lawyer & discuss your legal options.

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  • XHaol
    13 years ago

    He definitely sounds like he would be easy to disagree with... you should do whatever you know will make you happy... and this is a little off topic, but Born2BAStar, why all the capitals?

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  • ReaperAJ
    14 years ago

    I completely agree with Ollieo. Divorce him, you can't live like this the rest of your life.

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  • graceandglory
    14 years ago

    divorce sounds pretty good right now...

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  • wonderland
    14 years ago

    LMAO no, it is not normal. if you only ever wanated to change him then why did you marry him in the first place?

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  • mybuttholesmellsofshit
    14 years ago

    shut the fuck up and get a divorce you crazy bitch. he probably hates you too.

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    See a lawyer. Divorce. Force a sale of the house. If the children choose to stay, let them... call child protection if they are younger. Either way they won't won't last.

    You are holding all the cards. He can't function long without you and nothing compels you to put up with this. You pull out it all falls apart for him IMO. And maybe then he will get the psychiatric care he needs. In the meantime, save yourself and save your children.

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    • Born2BAStar
      14 years ago

      I Agree With You!

      Also Your Husband Needs To See Some Sort Of Phsycologist Or Councellor So That He Can Change His Hoarding Ways. He Obviously Has Some Issues With Not Having 'Enough' And Having To Keep Hold Of Other Peoples Stuff And Not Throwing Away. What You Need To Do Is Clear Out The House When He Is Gone. Get Rid Of Everything That He Has Not Used Within The Last Few Weeks Because It Is More Than Likely He Will Never Use It Or Think About It Again.

      You Both Need Councelling And If He Is Not Willing To Change Leave Him. You Cannot Afford Anything More Dangerous To Happen To Your Children. Imagine If Your Son Had Died Because It Was More Toxic.

      As It Is Your House, You Paid For It And So On Kick Him Out, Fix Up The House, Make Sure Your Children And The Hygiene Of The House Come First.

      Hope I Helped

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  • x1frosty16
    11 years ago

    Leave him.

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  • Crockett297
    12 years ago

    This is really sad...I will pray for you and your family. That is all I can do.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Ok i think its Not good that you go with this problems To a Side where 90% clearly under age sind. Because they aint Know nothing. But whatever. so what your husband has is a desease and sorry idk the englishname for it. What you have To do now is To devorce, because you CLEARLY don't Love him anymore. And you don't need him. Go See a lawyer Inform yourself what you can do in this situation . Don't Be too good or too Nice about that. Start throw stuff Away whether he Likes it or Not . You bought the house its YOURS and the lawyer can make him leave. As soon As he did Change the doorthing that He Cant go Inside by himself. And how old are your Children?

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  • sgbslp
    14 years ago

    Get the hay out of there before you and you kids get sick. No one should have to live like that.

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  • Cold.2.The.Bone
    14 years ago

    Save the kids from the influence. It's not too late. And cool your head while your at it. I think the trash fumes got to your head. I mean, KILL him?! Really?

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