Is it normal that i hate my family?
I really, really hate my life. Everything that i do is always a disgrace for them. I can't speak to them on daily basis and i hate how they always come into my room. My father is barely even home and he is one of the most emotional person i've ever known. I remember one time he smashed our dining table and threw glasses all around the house. He's a stingy old man, even for himself. My mother never appreciated me. She complained on almost everything, how i never clean my room (trust me, even if i did, it would never up to her clean-standard), how none of her kids want to help her (i don't want to because she'd talk in high voices and yell at me all the time and not being thankful for the help). My 1st sister is an obnoxious person. She would talk like she knows everything. My 2nd sister is very bitter and i hate how she always borrow my things, but she's the only one in the family that understand how much i hate this family. I don't have any shoulders to cry on to and i know that none of my friends understand what i've been through because they all lived in a big goofy family.
I once cried so loud, that i end up tell all of my nuclear family that i want to die, i want to end things, that i'm not happy living in this house, that i'm not happy being a part of this family. I even tried to kill myself in front of them. I was hoping that they would realize that there's something wrong with this family, that no one was happy in this family, but you know what their reaction are? They think that my suicidal toughts are nothing but bullshit. They told me to shut up and tell me to be thankful because there's so many person out there have bigger problems than i do. Really??????? and my mom always brings up my suicidal thoughts as a joke, like bitch, your daughter wants to die and you act like it's a mere teen joke?????
I can't wait till i move out from this little hell simulator called family.