Is it normal that i get sick of meeting people with tragic pasts?

49% Normal
9 Comments

I know right from the get go this makes me sound like a terrible person, and I don't really know why I'm like this, but for whatever reason, I've become sick of knowing people who've had something tragic or emotionally draining happen in their lives.

I'm not talking about people who complain or talk about their issues all the time, I'm just talking about people in general. Like I could know somebody at work for months, not really knowing much about them, and then I hear about something completely terrible that's happening in their life, and I feel like I just want to roll my eyes.

I've had a completely fortunate, and normal life: I've had no alcoholic parent, no abusive or controlling boyfriend, no manipulative or scheming friend, no person who's tried to molest me, I've never been kicked out of the house, my parents never got a divorce, I don't have an Autistic sibling, I didn't have a relative that died tragically, I don't have a close relative who's a terrible human being- I'm the only person I know that hasn't had anything like this happen to me.

Nothing bad has ever happened to me in my life, so really, that should make me more empathetic toward people who do have issues... but really, it just makes me annoyed.

Maybe I've just met so many people with issues, I've become immune to it, and I could care less about peoples' issues. Or maybe I feel like I'm the one that's weird because I have nothing tragic going on in my life, I don't know. Either way, every time I discover a person I know has something bad happen to them in their past, like one of their parents was an alcoholic, or their dog recently became blind, my first instinct is to roll my eyes and ask myself "Why can't I ever meet a NORMAL person?"

I don't really know for certain why I have little patience for people who reveal to me their tragic or painful or terrible pasts. I know this is a horrible thing to think, and I'm gonna get a bunch of comments saying "You're a heartless bitch", but maybe someone can help me why I think like this? Why don't I have more empathy for people who are less fortunate than me?

Voting Results
49% Normal
Based on 35 votes (17 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • college
    11 years ago

    It sounds as if these "type" of people are become redundant for you. This does NOT make you a bad person. I think it's great that you have had a decent life, I don't wish tragedy on anyone, but this may also be a reason why you are as empathetic towards people who have experienced hardship. I noticed a dramatic difference in how empathetic I am towards people after experiencing a tragedy myself, it changes you. So your feelings are normal, but I would suggest suppressing them while talking with someone who has experienced a tragedy.

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  • Epofly
    11 years ago

    You sound like almost every spoiled sorority bitch who I encounter all too often.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    I'm loling that you'd consider someone's dog going blind a tragic life event o.o; According to your description, I've had a pretty tragic life myself.

    I can understand why you'd eventually get tired of meeting people you absolutely can not.relate to.

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  • SarahB
    7 years ago

    i can see for this post you are clearly young and atill live at home with mummy and daddy. Having a Autistic relative is not tragic or bad or unfortunate ect when you live in the real world and you start having responsabilitys then you may understand whya real life is like in the real world . Shit happens people die , loose their job,home , wife,ect thats just LIFE

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  • changes123
    11 years ago

    College is so right... you won't understand unless you've experienced and been in their situation.

    Let's say you are very powerful, have a top job, and everything you could want. You look down at those who have misfortune and blame them for their own lack of success. Scenario switch, and you now experience the other side. You will never be the same again, and have felt first hand the misfortune.

    I had to go through shit to empathize with others. I'm really grateful for them too, I've learned a valuable lesson that's priceless.

    No ones life is without tragedy.

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  • telly34
    11 years ago

    I think I might have some insight as to why this irritates you.

    From my own personal experiences, when I was growing up, things that were problems in my life were usually due to or perceived to be due to a personal fault of mine.

    Other people who had problems, however, could always point the finger at someone else. Their alcoholic parents, this person died, that person ..., etc.

    So even though my problems were every bit as hurtful as theirs, they were perceived as all my own fault, so it added insult to injury. When they wanted pity for their problems, it was never their fault. It was always the fault of some external force that acted on them.

    So, like you, I will probably get hateful comments, but I realize that everybody has problems and just about everybody deserves empathy or someone who will listen. But at the time, it just seemed very frustrating for me.

    Hope this helps !

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  • Sweetypie4244
    11 years ago

    I think that you just want to know or meet somebody like you. A lot of my friends have strict parents but that's it. My life has been traffic but I've never met anyone who was annoyed by it. And if someone got raped don't ever roll your eyes at them because it was never their fault.

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  • americanhoney
    11 years ago

    Neuro, I seriously would love to meet you one day so I could punch you in the fucking face.

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  • shade_ilmaendu
    11 years ago

    You're probably struggling to meet "normal" people because normal doesn't exist, and it's rare indeed to go long through life without suffering; you should consider yourself lucky.

    I won't call you heartless, even though I'm not very much like you. You've never experienced anything tragic so you can't possibly understand what it's like. I hope you don't ever have to but the odds are someday your luck will run out, and I hope when and if it does you have surrounded yourself with good people so you have the support system you need to overcome.

    Tragedy does breed empathy though I don't think it necessitates it. Point being it's difficult to understand something you have no experience with, this is nothing to fault yourself for.

    I'd say it only botheres me to the extent that I wish there was less suffering in the world. Every day I do what I can to be good person and bring happiness to others in hope that they'll pay it forward, and that slowly we can all come to care about each other and make this world a better place. That's just me though. I'm gonna shut up now, ramble ramble blah.

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