Is it normal that i forgot intense feelings?

I'm 20 and will be graduating from the university in 1 (maybe 2) year(s). Last(and the only proper) relationship I had was 2 years ago. For the past few years, I didn't really feel it's absence and just focused on my work/art. Even called the time I spent in love "wasted" since I could improve myself during that time instead.

2 days ago, something happened. For entertainment, other than being with friends I either play some video games or watch some comedy animes. I picked a random anime that was tagged comedy and I've watched it, turns out it was a drama. I tend to avoid dramas but well, it got me somehow I finished it in 2 days. The next night I was sleeping/dreaming and in my dream I met this woman I've never even seen before, who was really pale and plain but beautiful and I've fallen in love with her. I strongly feel the sensation. When I woke up I was disappointed and sad. I felt like, I wasn't living my life to the fullest like I've forgotten what was important and spent my days in vain. I started worrying I'll never have an intense "real love" and either end up with a money sucking leech or some faker. Now, I'm not a good looking guy and I accept that. I only take pride in my intelligence and try to make it up with that, somehow.

I've never knew I was this weak when it came to feelings. I felt really really bad, almost depressed. In spite of that, I've pushed myself to face it and kept on watching dramas for a few days, or read them. During that time, I've almost broke up a few times but I've came to realize that I'm lacking not just love but all intense feelings, like jealousy, sense of belonging, hate, anger, but mostly feeling loved. Like I can't be loved, no matter who I meet, or who I become.

Are these normal? What should I do? Please comment.