Is it normal that i felt this way

6 years ago I met a very sweet, caring and very loving individual who changed my life forever. The first time I met her I didn't know how to pronounce her last name ( at the time). The first thing I said to her was " I might just mispronounce your name for the rest of the school year so I am so sorry" Eventually I got the hang of pronouncing her name right. Anyhow that's the little details that doesn't matter at all. well at least about the name.
So anyhow this person I met was my school counselor. She came in my life when my life was a wreck (not saying it hasn't gotten worse over the years). Anyhow she like I said changed my life forever. She was there for me when my own parents had no time for me. She was there for me during the summer between junior high and high school when all my “friends” were not. She was there for me to call at 9PM on a weekend when I wanted to kill myself. She was there to drop me off at home so I don’t have to walk home from summer school in 90+ degrees. She would let me hang out at her office during the summers so I didn’t have to go home and be lonely. She would occasionally even call me on summer evenings so see how I was doing. I was just the same I always looked up to her and cared about her. I was treated like an “adopted daughter”. She treated me like her daughter and she was my mother to me since my mother never had the time for me. Those were the great times.
With every good comes bad. The bad is that when I was high school student she introduced me to some folks at the high school who she said would take care of me. Turns out just month or two into high school they didn’t like that my counselor and I had a very close relationship. Before I knew it I was no longer allowed to talk to my “mom”, see her or have anything to do with her. For four years I felt lonelier than ever. The four years when I really needed a mother like figure I had absolutely no one. I occasionally ran into her several times in those 4 years, but it was just like I ran into some I knew of. The connection we once shared was lost along the way I solely blame the folks at the high school for my loss. But as eventually I started getting used to it. Then came high school graduation. It was the day I never thought I would live to see. But I did and on that day when no one from my so called family came, she came because I had invited her to come. And she told me she wanted to be there for ME. That meant to me more than anything else in this world. And then I never saw her after that.
It’s been almost two years and I haven’t spoken to her seen her since. But out of the blue I decided to communicate with her and told her I would like to go see her. She said that’s fine. Now the deal is I am going to go her in couple of days here. But she thinks I am going to go see her just because I haven’t seen her in a while. In reality it’s not just that in reality I want to ask her if she can spare some time for me outside of her time at the school one day. Outside of school because I want to tell her about how she made me feel and how thankful I was and still am that she was there for me during that year and a half. Also how I would like her to be part my life again if possible. So now I am curious as to how would she possibly take this?

Voting Results
93% Normal
Based on 15 votes (14 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Terence_the_viking

    Melting.

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  • anokhi

    So just to update everyone. I had my "meeting" so to say. And it went well. No grudges were held by me for anyone and No one seem to have any grudges against me. Basically to explain the gist of it. I went there caught up with few other folks from the school and then my old counselor stepped in. And she was delighted to see me, as I was. I lost count of how many times she told me she was proud of me. My only reply each time, I was proud of myself. So I kind of gave all of them updates as to what I am doing in life now days, and what I have done over the past few years and what I will be doing over next few years. And then the visit came to a close end as I understood that they have things to take care of. So towards the end I told her what was my purpose of this visit. Basically how I would like to talk to her ONE ON ONE, FACE TO FACE and out side of the school setting if possible. No emails, No letters!!! FACE TO FACE!!! Her reply was something I was hoping for. She told me that she would like to consult with people "high above" before doing something like that. And I am so glad she said that. But she also said something which answered all my other questions that I never asked. She said Yes I would like to say yes, but I have to consult with them first. And that answered more questions than I had ever asked. So giving myself some credit here I took the situation very lightly and understanding that this process is a must. So let's say her superiors do not approve of this. I would still be okay. At least I know that I tried to understand the other point of view. And I tried to let her know of my point of view.

    I have to say 6 years I never thought I would have the courage to walk through those doors and with my head high and say what I did today. So Kudos to me. And Kudos to my counselor for putting her ethical guidelines before me.

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  • peterr

    You should eat her out and get her to suck your little cock.

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  • ygrowup

    I am so sorry you had it so rough throughout your school years, but you already know that these trials, have made you into a very special unique person! By all means reach out to her and keep in touch and share with her your feelings. Good luck with your choices!

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    • anokhi

      I don't even know where to begin. she plain out declined to talk to me even with my therapist being present. I feel like she ruined my life in way. She did her share of helping first only to come back and hurt me.

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  • ProseAthlete

    No one can really tell you how she'll take your request to be a part of her life again.

    This may sound kind of cold, but she may not have the energy to devote to you at this stage in her life. She's clearly immensely proud that you've graduated, and she cares for you very much; that's clear. However, she has hundreds of other people who also look to her for guidance. She only has so much empathy and time to give to others, and no matter how much she loves you like a daughter, she has to draw a few lines sometimes.

    If I could share a little advice with you, when you see her, thank her for all that she's given you and let her decide what's next. Even though she cares for you, she may feel the need to distance herself; no one, not even a saint, can be someone's sole means of emotional support without feeling completely drained. You mention often how she fulfilled your needs, which is wonderful and giving of her, but sometimes people run out of empathy and energy to give.

    Do you want her in your life because you think she's a wonderful person or because you still feel the need for her support?

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    • anokhi

      To be honest with you I don't find your answer as cold as I once might have. Over the last six years I have learned to let go of things. And one of them was this. So in a way I can say I want her to be part of my life because I still feel the need for her support. But than that's barely true. The reason being is because I have made it through the last six years. And out of those six years two years on my own without any kind of support. So that just tells me if I have done it then I can do it again. So I think it's more of not wanting to let go of a wonderful person. But like I said if I have to by all means I think I would let it go completely. Because if I have done before why can't I do it now? And plus let's say somehow she does happen to be part of my life again. Then by no means would I like her to be part of my life the way she once was. I would not make her my only source of support. In fact she would probably be somewhere from the middle to the bottom of the list of source. The reason is because over the years I have learned few things here and there that would help me handle the situations MYSELF WITHOUT depending on anyone else.

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