Is it normal that i feel too ugly for my bf?

81% Normal
13 Comments

I've been with my bf for almost a year now. We're really close. We go along as best friends (we friendzoned each other before our relationship for quite a while :D) and also as a couple. I adore him so much and his presence just makes me feel more at home than i could be anywhere else.

So cut short: We're having this really relaxed and friendly relationship and there's a lot of trust going on.

Yet when I look at him or look up fotos of him, sometimes I just stare and adore how handsome he just is. And then I see myself and i think to myself that how ugly I am and that I'm too ugly to deserve to be with him - it makes me cry sometimes.

This is not a joke, i really feel kind of ugly next to him and it makes me feel ashamed and it also makes me feel sorry for him having to put up with me.

It's not like I'm not doing anything about my appearence, like i do keep myself groomed, taking a shower everyday, putting makeup on, regularily going to hairdresser etc.

He knows how I feel but assures me that he thinks that I'm beautiful and that he doesn't understand why I feel that way.
And still...I do not believe him. I keep feeling too ugly. I even thought of letting him go so he can find a prettier GF and be more happy.

Why do I have to feel that way?

*(sorry for the bad English, it's not my first language)

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 347 votes (281 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • purplegirl22
    12 years ago

    He is probably telling the truth that he does think you are beautiful.

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  • Energy
    12 years ago

    You need to relax. Gain some confidence'

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  • sharon_88
    6 years ago

    Do you feel like you can be yourself (real you) when you are around him? If not, the reason might be more emotional, manifesting in how you think you look when you are around him.

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  • Thorolf
    8 years ago

    He likes the way you look, so don't worry about it. Different people have different preferences and even if he is lying, all it means is that he loves you for your personality. I also agree with the post directly above mine.

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  • indiangirl
    8 years ago

    no one is ever ugly. I have to be honest that attimes i feel the same way but then I look in the mirror and remember my boyfirend believes im beautiful, so why shouldn't I. Think of it this way..With all of those dressed up barbies in the world he picked you. You! Talk to him tell him how your feeling and believe him when he tells you the honest truth...that you are beautiful

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  • Diver2
    9 years ago

    You probably are ugly.

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  • wistfulmaiden
    9 years ago

    Normal for you to worry but looks aren't the most important thing in life! Also beauty is only as one sees it so he may see you as the most beautiful person in the world. Just enjoy your life and if anyone makes rude comparisons tell them to go F themselves.

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  • kit-kat-bar
    12 years ago

    I say that if he wants someone prettier, then he will let you know, don't you think. I mean don't you trust him??

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  • porsublue
    12 years ago

    U should listen to "just the way you are" by Bruno mere. :) Imagine him singing it to u. :)

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  • wearygirl
    12 years ago

    Girl it's normal I feel the same way but I bet u are beautiful.

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  • crimsonSunset
    12 years ago

    I feel your feelings as I felt same, once. I know you cant escape from this fear of losing him.

    The difference between you and me iz- she hinted she will love me and let me fall in love with her. But she left eventually, she left me in a state where I almost died. . .But I survived.

    You've got his love, and afraid of losing him. Whatever happens, enjoy present time. As he said he doesn't care how u look like so maybe he mean it.

    I wish your fear never comes true and wish you a happy life ahead. Ask him to love you so much that kills this fear.

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  • iindia
    12 years ago

    If you are looking for a way to measure it.People need to be within a certain range of attractiveness. If one is an 8 and the other a 5 it is a problem. Within two points is acceptable for longevity of the relationship.

    Drop dead gorgeous girls are what I look for to hook up. Cute girls are great for relationships.

    Don't assume anything about how he feels toward you. Ask him instead.

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    • hulra
      12 years ago

      Seriously, what the hell? I hope you are objectively handsome enough to feel entitled to write that. This is complete crap.
      Obviously, relationships are also about the personality. Beauty is a subjective concept. Not saying that no one can be ugly and that beauty is only an idea, of course. Just that you can't rate beauty and expect people to agree with you. Because you consider someone "drop dead gorgeous" doesn't mean others will agree. It's not something you can count.
      Also, the problem here is not about finding someone beautiful enough to hook up (did you read what you just wrote above? It's unbelievably sexist and condescending). The girl above says she feels insecure because she feels impressed by her boyfriend's beauty. Not really sure your comment is helping anyone here, it looks more like a love declaration to yourself. And what's that about "acceptable" difference for relationships? It's not about finding the prettiest mate, you know.
      You certainly know that charm and personnality play an undeniable role. I've been going out with a boy who's not exceptionnaly attractive. However, after a few months of friendship, he was so nice, thoughtful and charming that I considered him very handsome.

      As for answering your question, anonymous girl, just because you consider yourself too ugly for him doesn't mean you are. If you feel insecure, it is very likely that you'll imagine yourself to be uglier than you really are.
      Who's saying he's dating you only for your looks? It's normal to want to look beautiful. He surely appreciate that you try to look your best. I'm convinced that if he stays with you, it's not only because you look attractive but more because he enjoys your company, because you make him laugh, because you think about him, and other reasons of the kind.
      It's pretty easy to say "relax" and "it's no big", it won't make you feel prettier. That you are careful about your looks is an advantage, though: it shows that you deeply care.
      What I can tell you is that your boyfriend obviously loves you for other reasons (you said you were friends before). There are no such things as rules to whether or not beauty should prevent a relationship. Continue being the person he loves and everything will be fine :)

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