Is it normal that i fantasize about having a different family

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I'm not really close to anyone in my family. We're too different to be close. I argue with my mum a lot and i don't really talk to my dad. My brother is four years younger than me and is obnoxious,homophobic,sexist,self obsessed and bullies other kids.I don't really have anyone that I'm really close to and feel that i can talk to. I've always wanted other siblings and I'm jealous of my friends who have more than one sibling. I have this fantasy in my head that i daydream about all the time. I daydream that i have a twin brother,a brother who is older than me by one year and a younger brother who is about four. They are all based on people that i know or have known at some point in my life. I think about the youngest the most. I think that the reason for this is that i lived in Paris for three years of my childhood. I was really close to our neighbours and they had two sons. The eldest was my brother's age so they played together all of the time. I was really close to the youngest son who was four. I looked after him,played with him and loved him as if he was my own flesh and blood. Even although i moved home two years ago i still miss our neighbours. I spent a lot of time at our neighbour's house and the boy's mum saw me as the daughter she didn't have. She treated me like a daughter and i still miss her even now. I used to teach her and her sons English and they used to teach me French. I think that the twin brother in my fantasy is based on a boy i once knew from primary school and i think that the eldest is a sort of mentor figure that is based on a teacher i once knew. Do you think that my subconsious has created this false family to try and stop me from missing these various people or should i be worried about this? Does anyone have any similar experiences?

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79% Normal
Based on 63 votes (50 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • fullhouse
    11 years ago

    I used to think like that in my teen age and I used to fight with my mom and used to think I am in a wring family but now that I think about I know I was being an idiot!
    Families will do some emotional damage sometimes but I've realised over time that no matter how inperfect your family is,they are your longest relationship and I do everything possible to make them happy and be there when they need.. But I am from India and family is very important for us..

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  • Anime7
    11 years ago

    I had a very similar experience. I remember that everyday I use to walk my dog at our local park and I became friends with all the adults who lived close by. One couple in particular was impressed that I, being a teenage at the time, had manners and respected my elders, turns out that they didn't have kids of their own and they were both in their 50s. Anyways, eventually they invited me over and it became a weekly thing. Every Friday I would come over for dinner and we'd relax and watch tv and stuff. I remember that Don (my other father) would always push me to strive to do my best, I already was doing well in school but it felt great to get noticed for piling on AP classes. I also remember that Kazie ( my other mother) would say how proud she was of me and how she wished other kids were like me. Anyways, they really showed me what it was like to have a real family, one who encourages you, loves you, and gives you helpful life advice. Sometimes I wonder how different, or should I say better, I would be if I was their kid. It's all over now but they were the closest thing I've had to a loving family, since I feel like my parents don't really care about me too much.

    In all honesty, I think it's ok to fantasize about a different family, especially if you had the opportunity to experience a new one. I think that you made up this fantasy family in part to make up for the one you have at home. I'm sure that you also have this fantasy for the reason you stated, to remember the people you had back in Paris. The ones who treated you kindly and like one of their own, who would want to remember that! I think you're fine and if anything, I think you'll probably grow up and be able to provide your children with a great family.

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