Is it normal that i dont relate love and sex at all?

I love sex... and when I was single I had casual sex with some guys and it was fine. But now that I have a boyfriend I feel bad cause I don't see any diference between "sex" and "making love". Is this normal?

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 159 votes (106 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • slutzombie

    Sex and love are completely different things. Having sex with someone you love is a whole new experience altogether.

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    • Are you a zombie butt slut?

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  • driedroses

    I think that love doesn't have to have sex, but sex can have love. Or it can just be sex. Whatever.

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  • peterr

    I love sex and love so I don't care to analyze it.

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  • thegypsysailor

    I've always thought that there were many ways to have sex.
    The quicky; usually with a steady partner when the situation allows.
    "Afternoon delight"; a "quicky" when you should actually be doing something else, like working. Also called "stolen moments".
    A "romp in the hay"; sort of a joyous, fun, all over the place thing, again usually with a steady partner, but not necessarily.
    There's angry sex (both partners into it) hard, un-tender and often just a release of tension.
    And "making love"; long, slow, attentive and gentle sex with someone you care for deeply.
    Of course there are others; we humans are an imaginative breed.

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  • "I love sex... and when I was single I had casual sex with some guys and it was fine. But now that I have a boyfriend I feel bad cause I don't see any diference between "sex" and "making love". Is this normal?"

    As someone already stated probably because you're not in love with this guy.
    He's just a guy you're calling your boyfriend and having committed sex with.

    Big difference between being in love with someone and not.

    Let me ask you, why should this guy be in a committed relationship with you when you've previously had meaningless random sex with other guys?

    Does he know you slutted around?

    What's in it for him?

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    • thecowboy911

      Man stop being so fuckin butthurt about every single girl here on this site sayin she sleeps with many guys or loves sex or watever i have seen ur responses on many other stories and i can tell u have been cheated on or dumbed or something which is ok shit happens but man if a girl " sluts around " cause she loves it doesnt mean she cant have a relationship in the future. C'mon u know if u had the chance to slut around u would and u would still be callin urself a good guy so dont be so judgmental

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      • I thought I was the only who noticed he only comments on girls stories and gets very butthurt in the process.

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      • Wrong cowboy.

        "C'mon u know if u had the chance to slut around u would and u would still be callin urself a good guy so dont be so judgmental"

        I can slut around all I want but the thing is I don't want to because it's not a healthy thing to do. I've got about 15 girls in this town I live in (moved here recently) that want to hook up with me. I'm only considering two of them. Most of the others are cute but there's no reason to just randomly screw so many girls so I've narrowed it down to the two I like most.

        Slutting around is bad because :

        *It's a health risk.
        *It's a waste of my time.
        *It can cause unwanted drama and flirting with these girls already has caused unwanted drama for me and I haven't even slept with any of them yet.
        *While slutting around with random unimportant girls I may be missing opportunities to be with a great girl. And if that 'great' girl finds out I've slutted around with dozens of little sluts then she may not take me seriously or she may find it very hard to trust me.

        I wouldn't blame her. All of these girls work at the stores, restaurants, etc. in this small town so I literally couldn't go anywhere without running into a girl I've fucked plenty if I fuck them. So how could this 'great' girl that I'd want to be my girlfriend feel comfortable with me in this town knowing that?

        She probably couldn't and even if she could in the back of her mind she'd be thinking every time I'm out I'm fucking some little slut I met / knew that works at some store or restaurant that I ran into.

        I wouldn't trust a slut that's fucked a bunch of guys in this town or anywhere especially knowing that she would be running into them every day while shopping, grabbing lunch, etc.

        If you or others would, then I think you'd be foolish.

        I'm in my 40's, I know what I'm talking about. I've lived it and I'm smart enough to think ahead and avoid trouble most of the time.

        Remember that unwanted drama thing I was mentioning?
        Well, I've flirted with most of these girls and they're all smiley and googley eyed for me which is fun but after a few weeks of me not asking them out they start to turn very bitter!
        Literally one was throwing me mean 'how dare I' looks at me across the store one day when I was shopping. She was staring me down watching me and I was with family members shopping so not cool at all. I later learned from someone that knows that girl that she's married and recently called the cops on a guy she was flirting with and filed a restraining order against him when SHE was also flirting with him and leading him on.
        Nuts. Glad I didn't fuck her!

        Another girl I was flirting with turned totally depressed and was beaten down one of the last times I saw her.
        I walked into the store and saw her so I was looking at her to get her attention and I smiled and waved 'hi' to her and when she saw me she literally just got totally sad because she knows I wasn't asking her out and probably won't be. I did some shopping and she was my cashier so we chatted and I flirted with her more and made her happy again but not like when we first met.

        Another girl I recently met is a family member's friend. She's 17. I met her for like 2 minutes then left. She told my family member she wants to date me and hook up/etc. and to find out if I want to hook up with her.
        I didn't. She was really cute and sexy but I don't think we're really compatible and I picked up on other vibes when chatting her so I decided to not go there. What happened next?
        Next time I saw her like a week later I said 'hi' to her and smiled and she was all bitchy and mean to me. Way bitter bro.
        Many girls are like land mines and need to be carefully avoided.
        That was some time ago and now she's over it so she's nice again. She's actually married but still wants to hook up but I don't go there.
        She had a kid too and is kinda fat now. Not really fat just a little plump.

        Want another one?
        A girl that I am considering that works at a market here in town was totally flirty with me and I with her but then I let a lot of time lapse because I was out of town, busy, sick/didn't really care to hook up with her or anyone so I let it die down.

        What was the result?
        I just saw her again and she was very cold, distant and bitter. I actually smoothed things over with her and she said she wanted to go out with me but I'm not so sure. She also looked thrashed compared to how she normally was.

        Anyway this is what I've been telling you guys, girls I flirt with or hook up with go bonkers for me, literally.
        If I don't get on them they get bitter or depressed or whatever. When I do make one my gf or we hook up it can be good but it's a lot of work and very time consuming which I don't really want to put up with right now.

        In another town I lived in I've had a waitress that wanted to date me so badly that she offered to pay my tab whenever I came into the restaurant and she wanted me to invite my friends, etc. She offered to comp my meals, pitchers of beer, etc. My guy friends were like 'HELL YEAH!" but I don't believe in using people so I never let her pay my bill and I actually started avoiding her and that place because it was awkward. I even tried to hook my buddy up with her and they hung out but she didn't like him. She only wanted me.

        I'm generally very picky especially when I was younger.

        I've got so many experiences with girls/women like these that it's partially why I don't slut around.

        There's really nothing good that comes from fucking more than one girl to be honest.
        When I was younger I've fucked and dated a lot of girls and guess what I got for it?
        NOTHING. I'd trade all of the 'wrong' ones for just one right one :)

        There's so many drawbacks to slutting around compared to being in a monogamous relationship, to me it's just not worth it.

        Btw, one of the two girls might be a bit of slut so I might forget her.
        Why should I lower myself and deal with a slut and those issues when I can get prime meat that half the town hasn't fucked?

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        • beautywithin

          i think you had the perfect type personality. Maybe that is why in your 40's you are still looking for the right one. I'm not judging you but observing you only.

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  • Shroot

    Because you're not in love.

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    • RoseIsabella

      I'm not in love
      So don't forget it
      It's just a silly phase I'm going through
      And just because
      I call you up
      Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
      I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

      I like to see you
      But then again
      That doesn't mean you mean that much to me
      So if I call you
      Don't make a fuss
      Don't tell your friends about the two of us
      I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

      I keep your picture
      Upon the wall
      It hides a nasty stain that's lying there
      So don't you ask me
      To give it back
      I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me
      I'm not in love, no no, it's because..

      Ooh you'll wait a long time for me
      Ooh you'll wait a long time
      Ooh you'll wait a long time for me
      Ooh you'll wait a long time

      I'm not in love
      So don't forget it
      It's just a silly phase I'm going through
      And just because I call you up
      Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made
      I'm not in love
      I'm not in love

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      • Fleetline

        One of the great songs of all time

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        • RoseIsabella

          Indeed.

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      • Nope.

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      • loopoo

        Enrique, is that you?

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      • Shroot

        u wot m8

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        • RoseIsabella

          It's just an old song called "I'm Not in Love" by 10cc. Tori Amos did an interesting cover of it on her Strange Little Girls album.

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  • Cherrybombpieee

    Neither do i i wish i could

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  • White__October

    I think it's very normal. You shouldn't see the difference between sex and making love because there is no difference. Sex is sex, simple as that. Wether you are in love or not doesn't make any difference.

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  • KeddersPrincess

    Sex and love don't have to go together. To the people commenting saying that she's not in love, people love differently, and people see sex differently. Some people are only willing to have sex with people they have feelings for. Other's (like me) don't want to have sex at all and would prefer a relationship where sex isn't required. Sex is different for everyone as everyone functions differently and everyone responds to love and emotions differently.

    Don't feel guilty because sex is a physical thing for you. A lot of other people feel the same way. My advice to you is to just stay faithful if you really care about this person.

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  • Ibelievethis

    I don't connect the 2 either. xx

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  • makes total sense to me too..since "sex is a physical action" and to "love comes from the heart" and you don't always use your heart when your having sex...

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  • RomeoDeMontague

    I dont either.

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  • Phishy

    You must not love your boyfriend, because clearly you only see it as sex.

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