Is it normal that i dont like my kids?

I couldnt even read a lot of the comments here, i have 2 toddles and they are the love of my life, id give anything for them just like the OP who works her A$$ off to get food for the annoying lil teens! Of course is normal to dislike them they have attitudes, they are ungrateful, cost a lot of money, youth, time, patience, tolerance. But you still love them, as for your finances i cant say much but you seem pretty normal to me ok? Hugs

Too many kids without kids of their own posting on this serious topic! I think you are doing a great job, you kids sound fantastic....not sure why you don't like them??? But I agree parenting is incredibly difficult (I have two boys 4 and 3) but I can't imagine how hard it must be to do it on your own - I think it is perfectly normal to go through feelings of hatred.....they are born out of feelings of desperation. Brace yourself and keep your chin up.

Interesting responses. Especially queenjenn. I am pretty sure I didnt get into what type a parent I am... and actually. My oldest daughter had gotten straight A's all thru HS, wants to go into the medical field and is an amazing student and an amazing person (it is simply her and I that struggle). My youngers girls get A's and B's, and are also equally amazing. What makes my parenting difficult is lack of support from their worthless father, and all those parents that feel like letting their child do anything they choose, whenever they choose. I HAVE MORALS. I HAVE RULES. I HAVE STRICT PARENTING TECHNIQUES. THis is not normal for the society of today. And I suffer for it because my kids see other kids that dont have to live up to the expectations I set. I had my children young... and I have ALWAYS supported them without state help. And I am teaching my children those same morals.

To Listen: I am obviously an atheist??????? WHA??????? Seriously? That is almost laughable... that you would make that statement due to the tiny paragraph I wrote. I am a strong Christian. Jesus is my Savior.

Deepthought 33 - You must not have teens and live in a small town?? Jobs?? lol... most often no one is going to employ anyone under 18. That is the country we live in. Dont you realize that all those people "protecting" our children have taken away all the ways they learn how to be productive citizens??

Thank you to the people that had the words of encouragement and the suggestions. Thank you.

Do they have jobs? Encourage them to make a little money for themselves and that will not only loosen things up a tiny bit for you and teach them valuable life lessons but will also get them out of the house.
They need love and support though. The last thing you want is for one of them to be irresponsible and get pregnant.

You feel like a failure as a mother because your struggling without support which equals you being stressed out and exhausted where you just wish you were alone so you could get a break. Add that in with teenaged girls (I'm assuming their normal teenagers and can be a handful and rebellious) and it's a mental struggle for you. Do you love them and just don't like them right now? Or do you just not love them? Really you need to change your attitude on this I know it's hard but you should look at it as an opportunity to grow closer to you girls by explaining to them how you feel. They may not care because most teenagers are selfish but they may surprise you, they may feel neglected by you and can sense you don't like them, which can do major emotional damage. Cheer up it's hard and sucks but if you raise good, self sufficient, law abiding women than you were a success!

I dont have kids for that reason.. I would feel the exact same way. Whether ppl will admit it or not im sure other mothers feel that way and you are not alone

Thanks in advance, I am sure I will be paying for your kids teen pregnancies bc youre a shitty parent! People like are the reason America is the way it is!

*HELP not leo

You love your children. You are just overwhelmed by the, for less of a better word, burden of being a single mother. This should draw you closer to your kids. Because all you have is one another. They need you, they depend on you, they look up to you, they love you, they are grateful to have you in their lives. Cherish the time you have with them. And please seek counseling, to Leo you cope with the divorce, being a single parent and your negative feelings toward your children.

This makes me so sad...

To original poster,

I feel exactly the way you do. My kids are 14 and 11, and I find each day very challenging. I too, have no family or financial support, I work and go to school fulltime. I cry myself to sleep at nights because I feel like a failure as a mother. I love my kids a lot but I don't think they love me at all. I used to be very close to my children and I can't believe I have gotten to the point where I feel that I can't wait for them to be adults and on their own. Many people cannot understand unless they walk in your shoes. I pray that things will get better for you. Keep trusting in God.

I honestly think you worded your story wrong. Sounds like you are very defensive toward them and care for them very much. I'm thinking you dislike the situation rather than your children! As a single dad, i've hit rock bottom myself after a disappearing act from my ex. It can only get better!

normal. there are plently of bad mothers out there....

To original poster,

I do feel your pain. Even though I am still married I have felt what you are feeling. It is possible to still love your children and not like them at the same time. My daughter is 27. Just moved out 2 months ago to finish college out if state. My son in 23 and still lives at home. He just got a job one month ago from being unemployed for 2 years because of this damn economy. It was very hard raising them as teenagers. Peers have more influence than we do. I did feel like a single mom because my husband worked 14 hour days. And busy on the weekends. I did most of the parenting. I think I did an okay job. Other adults who meet my kids say what good people they are. It will get better. Our circumstances may be different but close to feeling the same. teenagers are soooo hard. Giving you the chicken neck and rolling their eyes. Being defiant. Rules have changed since I was a teenager. It seems that teens have more rights than the parents. It's very frustrating.
I could go on standing on my soap box, but I will call it quits for now.

Chin up. I feel for you. I know it's hard.

If you don't like them PARENT THEM! Disciplin them! Teach them how to be people that you do like and respect! You are their mother

Johnnybravo - Lovely... and I am whats wrong with the society? I had my children, WHILE I WAS MARRIED, to the same man. He was an abusive a-hole, that refuses to support the children he has, but continues to have more. Ummmm.... Really???? I have always worked and supported my kids, ON MY OWN. People like you make me strive to be better, and have my kids BE BETTER THAN THAT.

I think it's incredibly sad, but entirely normal. Thanks to the stress of single parenting, these kids are nothing more than a burden to you. And they can probably tell on some level, so they probably aren't the best kids (no love to make them feel shame for bad things they do). So you got stuck with 'em, and they're going to be lousy adults. It's a big world, it happens. Don't lose sleep over it

I would not recommend telling your kids that you don't like them. That would cause a lot of unnecessary problems.

Teenagers suck, pure and simple. You've got to be exhausted, worn to the bone and feel like you've got nothing left to give. It's not like you can take a break and go away for a weekend. My recommendation would be to find some sort of online escape that you can go to an hour a day. An online community of friends and support could really give you something to look forward to everyday and a way to briefly escape reality.

That is not normal ..yu suppose to love yur kids no matter what...

If you dislike your kids, there's a good chance they already sense it and resent you for it. It's incredibly unfair to project your bullshit on to them - they are innocent. They didn't ask for parents who don't give a shit about them. In addition to clothing, feeding and educating them, you are responsible for helping to develop their emotional well being. So, keep that shit to yourself and try REALLY hard not to project your bullshit on to them. YOU are the adult, so fucking act like one.

In a nutshell - yeah, it's hard as hell. SUCK IT UP.

You should consider how incredibly blessed you are to even have children. Especially considering those who can't have kids and really want them.

Should of close your legs

Tell your daughters too

Whore

Suck it up! U did it to yourself! Don't blame your kids or their father because u decided u don't want to be a mom anymore!

It's normal to think that way, it's normal to see reality as it is, and leave emotions behind you. Your obviously a big atheist, it's normal, but it's hard to give you advice.

Shitty