Is it normal that i don't want to tell my parents i'm gay?

88% Normal
16 Comments

I recently discovered that I am more intrigued by my same sex, and love spending time with males, but all my friends are females. Mostly likely because their the more nurturing sex. My parents don't believe that a man can love a man/woman can love a woman, a woman has to love man, and man has to love a woman. I feel uncomfortable to share this information,that I'm gay, with either of them. I wan't to share this with my older sister, she is sweet and believes in all types of love. But i'm afraid i I tell her, she will tell our parents. I was called "gay", and "fag" in school. But I can't hide my actual feelings forever. Is this normal? Am I normal?

Voting Results
88% Normal
Based on 48 votes (42 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    Don't come out until you are financially independent and living on your own, preferably someplace far from them. I have heard of so many unfortunate cases when people came out, their family completely turned on them and they were kicked out. (For some support look up The Born This Way Foundation or you can join a site called "Empty Closets". Anyone in the LGBTIQA+ community are welcome, in fact they are the focus of the site.) Good Luck! :D

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    • Mike-xx01
      9 years ago

      Thanks :) That's what I'm scared of, when I bring up LGBT in a conversation they try to shut me out, I mean it doesn't work, but I fear they will kick me out. I mean it's not likely, they love me, but I hope they wont. I will probably tell my sister first, she her take on it.

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  • seakelp
    9 years ago

    I knew this guy with some pretty strict catholic parents (his mom was against women's suffrage). Both he and his brother were gay, and while the parents weren't very happy about it, they still loved them because they were their kids. Parents can be understanding, especially when it comes to their children.

    Live your life, bud.

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    • Mike-xx01
      9 years ago

      Thanks, I will tell my sister then move onto my parents. Really though, thanks.

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  • Haddaway
    9 years ago

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhrBDcQq2DM

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  • imadragon
    9 years ago

    You don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to, you don't owe them that.

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    • Mike-xx01
      9 years ago

      I know, but it's hard to keep things like sexuality a secret, if you burst it out on accident, your friends/family may feel hurt you kept it from them. I will tell them, but one at a time, you should too. :)

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      • imadragon
        9 years ago

        You're right, good luck :)

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  • TheOneWhoComesFromEnordro
    9 years ago

    It's indeed normal. I'm gay myself (Something I just discovered too) and I can't find it in me to tell my mother. You're not alone. Maybe your sister can help you open your true feelings to your parents. If your sis can understand and accept you (which I'm positive she will), then they should too.

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    • Mike-xx01
      9 years ago

      I will, she believes love is love. No matter race/gender e.t.c :)

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  • ballchan
    9 years ago

    just don't tell anybody
    unless you want to fuck yourself up.

    it's still not the right timing ,
    until then, just hold.

    trust me, or you gonna be another tortured soul.

    gay + rich = no one can give a damn/blame at you
    gay + poor = freak/a poor fuck.

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  • Dr.Moe_Lester
    9 years ago

    Shucks, My parents, siblings, and friends where downright pissed when I confessed that I was bi-sexual. My brother threatened to un-alive me with a power drill and dump my corpse in a wood chipper... But I pulled through the hate, moved out, became pretty wealthy off of selling art and antiques. Just tell them and everything should be fine, If they get angry than screw them they don't understand what true love is.

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  • funkedup
    9 years ago

    From some of the back and forth, it seems like your folks are also not ready to hear about this, and you're probably smart to keep it to yourself. It sounds like you're still in school (high-school?). I'm quite a bit older than you, but in my day very few people came out to their parents in high-school. Most waited for university, when they had their own place, a job, etc.

    Aside from that, I think it's totally normal. You don't owe anyone an explanation about this (except the person you're trying to be intimate with) - even the straight kids in your school aren't telling their parents about their sex lives or preferences. I doubt that anyone could honestly be hurt about you "keeping" it from them until you're hiding it for like 50 years or something. It's so essentially private and the type of deep realization that takes time to develop, accept, share, etc.

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  • searchy
    9 years ago

    Don't take this the wrong way, but since you have a lot of girl friends, are you sure you are gay? Maybe you're just confused or want to experiment. There's nothing wrong with that, kinky!

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  • JesusForPresident
    9 years ago

    What will your church think?

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    • Mike-xx01
      9 years ago

      I actually don't know. I hope they will accept me for me. Only people on IIN know i'm gay.

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