Is it normal that i don't know how to feel about my transgender friend

My friend has expressed to me 2 weeks ago that he feels like he is transgender and needs to be a woman in order to feel better about himself. I've been supportive and told him that he needs to do whatever it is that makes him happy. However, I went to his house yesterday and he was wearing a bra, lipstick, wig, carrying a purse, and presenting his whole self as a female. To be honest, I really don't feel too comfortable being around it, because I've known him for 2 years and never would have thought he felt like a woman. I don't want to drop him as a friend because that would be wrong, but I don't feel comfortable around him as I did before. What should I do?

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70% Normal
Based on 202 votes (142 yes)
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Comments ( 22 )
  • GenderConfused

    Im in the same position as your friend.
    Im a crossdresser and i've told a few of my friends.
    Most of them couldn't accept it and we are no longer friends.
    I can only tell you that he is the same person he was before you knew so it shouldn't matter what he wears.
    If, however you cannot accept it then it would be better to tell him and end the friendship because he has probably been wearing panties for the two years that you've known him and dressing up when he's alone and now needs to take the next step (going public) so it would be nice if he had a friend that didn't spurn him for being himself.
    People cant help how they feel, and you probably even have friends with even odder or worse secrets.
    This friend is likely to be the bravest person you know for having the guts to tell you and would be a loyal life long friend.
    DONT let pre-programmed beliefs end a good friendship.

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  • ccjigsaw

    If he's really your friends, you've got to try an be supportive. I'm sure he knew that the sudden transformation wouldn't be easy for other people to understands, so I doubt he'll be suprised if you tell him you find it odd. Maybe if you talk to him a little he can help you understand what he's going through. I personally found tarnsgender fascinating at one point, and I looked up on youtube, some people as kids who already knew they were transgender. It's a feeling of being born as the wrong gender, and in a sense, trapped. It was probably hard for him to make the decision to be true to his feelings. If you really feel like after giving it a chance, you can't accept the new him, then yes, you should probably not be his friend anymore. It would be hard on him having someone around who is disproving, and hard for you as well. On a brighter note :D Atleast he's not your boyfriend, right? That would be a SHOCKER~!

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  • HospitalForSouls

    Give support and love your friend through it!

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  • johnho

    Continue to support him as a friend as you said, unless you are judgmental and shallow and want him to hide his real feelings, or you are embarrassed of him in his difficult time.

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  • RIPMitchXx

    If you're uncomfortable, that's understandable. You've known him for 2 years as a male, so him suddenly being a female may come as a shocker. Give it a bit to see if you can get used to the idea. If you can't, tell him honestly that you just can't do it. As long as you're not trying to be rude or hurtful about it, he should understand why you're saying that.

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  • noid

    Normal not to feel instantly comfortable around him/her. It will take time.

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  • Nokiot9

    Man the fuck up. Ypur friend is in a difficult part of his life. He needs all the support he can get. Abandoning him right now won't do either of u any favors. what makes you uncomfortable? Lol is he gonna make you play dress up with him? Jesus Christ....

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  • KayleneCarol

    Honestly i feel like no matter who they are. Female or Male. They are always going to be the same friend you love and knew.. Don't judge someone by what you just recently learned about them when you have been their friend for longer than 2 years.. This is normal but, It's not normal when your having second guesses about your friends.

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  • quentari

    I suggest talking to her about it. It can't come as a surprise that you'll need time to adjust, just let her know you support her fully but it will take time to stop thinking "him" and start thinking "her". Hopefully she should understand, and maybe tone it down, be more gradual at least in front of you.

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  • Terence_the_viking

    Tell him how you feel.

    He's gonna find out sooner or later.

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  • Tell him it's a stupid idea.

    Because let's face it people, it's a really stupid idea.

    And you will always have man hands.

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    • RIPMitchXx

      You're an ignorant person ya know that?

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      • Ignorant would be if I were unaware that the right thing would be him doing what he feels best. But seeing as I am aware of it and knowingly decide to ignore it purely for the sake of sarcasm, means this can't apply to me.

        It does on the otherhand mean that you are ignorant in regards to the meaning of "ignorance".

        Oh my, what a piffle you create with your foolishly limited understanding of words.

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  • randypete

    let him be your fuck buddy

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  • bigkitty

    You have to show him that you support him when you are around him. Help him look the part, think of it as a game your playing and the game is making him look and pass as a girl. Do all you can to help him out even tho you dont like it, dont let him know that you dont.
    Guys want to feel good about what they want to be same as you so dont put him down support every thing he wants to do.
    And sometimes the guy may wonder what it would be like to be a girl so make him up and let him experience it all so he will know how it actually feel like wearing everything 24/7.

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  • NobodyKnows

    There are probably genuine transexuals out there, but your friend may not be one of them. Sounds like he has other issues.

    BUT I am neither trans nor a doctor so I can't say for sure.

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  • runescaperules!!!

    Ok I my myself am male to female trans and wen I told my freinds they were acting like its all cool and evrything but then. Like they dropped me as a friend and I can tell u it really uurts it does so if ur uncomfertable around her talk to her about it heck look at some pics (shemaleplus.com) <===contains pornographic pics do.not.look at if under age of 18) hut yea just like talk to her about it like uno she's the same person she's always been

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  • strayan

    This is a hard one :/ just be completely honest with him, tell him how you feel but also respect how he feels

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  • senadgar

    If your not comfortable around it, tell him and find a new friend. You won't be happy in life unless you hang out with people who you are comfortable around. Anything else and you live a lie, then eventually you will cause more pain than if you are honest.

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  • 6inbigwightdick

    Dump him

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  • TheThingBoysTouch

    Give him a hug and rub him hard.

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  • michaels4p5

    drop him anyways or people out in public will stare at the both of you.

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