Is it normal that i don't have any female friends?

I feel like I don't have anyone on my side, including my family. I used to get excited when I met someone new to hang out with but I know better that it's only a matter of time before they start acting jealous & insecure. It's like everyone I know ESP. Girls are not capable of having 50/50 friendships. Its like all of them are setting the tone from the beginning by saying indirectly "I'm not going to put any effort into this friendship,if you want to see me you will have to be the one to contact me" like its a popularity contest. I don't follow people & don't expect anyone to follow me, I just want to hang out. I feel like I have to be really quiet around new "girlfriends" to keep them around longer bc if I say anything positive about my life or if they know a cute guy likes me its over. One time when I met a new potential girlfriend and we made plans to hang out I got really nervous before we went out (& when it's a guy I really like I almost feel like I could have a panic attack) bc I've had so many bad experiences w/friends in the past. I've changed a lot now, I don't expect anything good from anyone anymore. I've been told by a lot of people that I'm different and brave. I guess cause I moved to another country bymyself when I was in my early 20's, people seem to make a big deal about it. I feel like a lot of people, even my own family would be pleased to know when/if Im failing at something. I basically just keep to myself anymore and am really private. I would like to have genuine female friends, but I've noticed I much rather enjoy my freetime just being bymyself and doing my own thing than having to put up with somebody's bs. Other times I think I am way too nice and I'm attracting the wrong type of people. Trust me I have thought of everything. Sometimes I think of the phrase "when one door closes, another opens" Well I've closed a lot of doors on people who didn't respect me. and I'm still waiting for a door to open that's not the same typical immature & insecure person I always meet. It sucks & its boring! I used to give people probably more chances than they deserved and now I just don't have it in me anymore. I know that I'm a good friend and people who disrespect me don't deserve my friendship, esp for me to keep giving them chances when my instincts are telling me from the beginning this person does not have the best intentions for you. (so these "friendships" never last too long) I've got a lot of hobbies and things I love to do but sometimes I want to do something with someone else who is fun and is comfortable to be around. I can be around them & they're not trying to compete with me, we're just enjoying the moment. I would much rather have a few good genuine girlfriends to do things with than a boyfriend. Plus some of the guys I've hung out with seem like they're your friend but they are really wanting something more and it never works out when they find out you only want to be friends. It's to the point where I feel like I need to ask a therapist advice what it is about me that I don't have any girlfriends. I don't know why it seems like everyone I know acts this way-even my family.