Is it normal that i don't find myself to be very attractive?

93% Normal
17 Comments

Honestly, I don't see myself as that attractive of a guy. Everyone tells me that I'm a really good looking guy. Such as my mom, grandparents, (who both say it's a completely unbiased comment they're making), female friends, etc. Honestly I just don't see it. It's not me being modest, but I think it might be partially that I have a lower self-esteem level than most guys my age (18). I'm slightly on the heavier side, but barely, and I'm on an acne treatment that, without it, I'd look like a pepperoni pizza face. To boot, I've never had a girlfriend, which I think also triggers the thoughts that I'm not attractive. Is my thought process normal?

Voting Results
93% Normal
Based on 82 votes (76 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • Corleone
    11 years ago

    It's normal you don't find yourself very attractive. You'd be surprised by how many people have a low self-esteem.

    The thing is, you're your own worst judge. When you're standing in front of a mirror, you'll notice a lot more flaws that other people would.

    Maybe it helps if you take some time to stand in front of a mirror and point out what you like about your face/body. Everybody has imperfections, but that doesn't make you ugly. It makes you human.

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  • watermelonninja
    10 years ago

    Me too. I used to be hot and I don't know what happened. My looks faded away. My husband still thinks I'm beautiful but I just don't see it!

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  • PalestinianGuy
    11 years ago

    Work on the stuff you can change for example workout, it will boost your confidence.

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  • Aleks85
    11 years ago

    prove it.

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    • aminormal321
      11 years ago

      don't be so cynical

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      • Aleks85
        11 years ago

        hmm, member for 1 day 20 hours. You'll find that "cynical" is this board in a nutshell.

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  • westoptic
    11 years ago

    I also think I'm fuck ugly. I don't ever say it to anyone because I hate getting compliments ( I don't know how to respond to them) and don't want anyone to think I'm fishing for sympathy, but I am pretty confident that I am below average on the attractive scale. It doesn't bother me, I am who I am. If you have confidence issues may I suggest taking up something like music? Being really good at something like guitar or piano is an attractive quality and it can help lure some girls in.

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    • aminormal321
      11 years ago

      That's where you and I differ, I absolutely hate it. I really fucking hate not thinking i'm attractive. I see all these guys walking around my school with these gorgeous women on their arms and I'm stuck alone. I'm not trying to be "Oh woe is me" but it certainly is depressing. I really want a gf, and honestly I wouldn't want to date a girl that's unattractive. It's not me being shallow it's just my preference. And that's not easy to when I'm unattractive (at least so I think) and probably am insecure.

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      • westoptic
        11 years ago

        I can completely understand how you feel, although I do not feel the same. It is human nature to seek companionship, attractive companionship. You aren't being shallow, just honest, not many people will honestly say "I'm looking for someone unattractive to date". Please know this: I'm a girl, I used to be very self conscious, all of my friends were pretty and dated good looking guys and I was always the third wheel, so to speak, and always seeking some sort of relationship. It never happened, and I felt like no one wanted me. As soon as I stopped caring about being self conscious and as soon as I stopped looking for a guy about a year ago, a ton of guys started wanting to hook up with me just this year, over the past few months actually. It is the strangest thing and also a very nice ego boost.

        My advice to you is don't go looking, I know it's hard because you want the comfort of someone else who cares about you on an intimate level, but the best things come to those who wait, and the less you go looking, the more likely you'll come across someone on a random occasion that you end up really hitting it off with. I am sure you are not unattractive, there are not many people I know who I can honestly say aren't attractive to some degree. Keep your head in the game, it's the guys like you that end up with the girl that's a keeper, your friends will probably suffer through lots of heartbreak and pissed-off-ness before they find someone they truly care for.

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        • aminormal321
          11 years ago

          I really appreciate the kind words and the advice. Also, about your previous comment, I've been playing guitar for 7 years lol

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        • dalmationUntoyourSoul
          11 years ago

          does the not looking thing work for guys too ya think? because it's always been my strategy to be as pretty as possible and hope girls would hit on me. i also wouldn't take a girls number but give her mine instead and leave it up to her to call me. recently i've been approaching girls and getting their number sometimes, think it would be good practice to meet new people and act like a boy. but i haven't called any of them because i was riding a bicycle every where and camping out behind my workplace.

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  • Jasmina
    11 years ago

    Your insecure don't know what for. You turning heads when you walk through the door. Your beautiful beautiful ! #One Direction

    Apparently you are being insicure

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  • dappled
    11 years ago

    It does sound like self-esteem issues and women are often a bit turned off by a lack of confidence. You may have got yourself into a vicious circle here.

    How many girls have you asked out? If the answer isn't very many, there's a solution for you. Although I know it's probably not going to be easy for you.

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    • aminormal321
      11 years ago

      I've only ever asked out one girl directly. I kinda hinted it to two other girls but was friend-zoned, if you have a solution, i'd be more than glad to hear it.

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      • dappled
        11 years ago

        Okay, that's not too difficult. Find something you are confident about and talk about that. Women like men who know what they are talking about, and they hate liars. Don't *ever* lie to a woman. Don't pretend you are something you are not. Be yourself and good luck. :)

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  • RacksOnRacks
    11 years ago

    It's completely normal!
    Nearly every teenager (including myself) has a low self esteem or want's to change something about their appearance.
    You need to work on it though, otherwise it'll rule and ruin your life. Be happy with who you are and live life like there's no tomorrow. Listen, i've been through it all before and it's a hard thing to come out of, but once you have everything seems better. Focus on the things about yourself that you like instead of what you dislike. I'm sure you're very attractive and soon you'll find a girl right for you. Maybe you haven't found a lady because you don't socialize enough or put yourself out there. If so, then put yourself in social situations, make yourself vulnerable even, do things that you usually wouldn't. Sorry for the lecture, hope some of this helps in anyway. (: adios

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  • Theycallme
    11 years ago

    You'll grow into your looks. I look like my dad when he was young, he looks exactly like david duchovny when he got older, im young but will look more handsome as i get older like my dad did, eat healthy give it time

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